Winter break has mercifully arrived. Being home after such a stressful semester involves a strange transition period. The first week, for me, revolves around living out of my hamper, consuming all of the homemade food, and sleeping in until 9 am before getting up to go hang out with friends from high school. All though hanging out with my friends is awesome, going to the mall a week before Christmas and Hannukah is like shopping before the apocalypse. Everyone and their mother are out shopping for the holidays. The stores are congested with long lines, all of the beautiful holiday displays are ruined, and the poor retail workers are frazzled. There are many thoughts I had during shopping, but here are 48 of the most prominent:
1. THIS PLACE IS ABSOLUTELY CROWDED
2. Why are so many people in Target?
3. Oh my God! Lady! You can't move at a leisurely pace during the holiday season!
4. Stop moving so slowly.
5. Move, move, move, move.
6. Did she just run over my feet?!
7. Don't kill anyone. Don't kill anyone. Don't kill anyone.
8. Where are my car keys?!
9. Oh! They're in my hand.
10. Okay. What did I come to Target for?
11. What I need is not here!
13. Did I lose my friend?
14. There she is!
15. Ah, Sephora. Land of the popping highlighters and the Anastasia Beverly Hills brow liner.
16. Who wanted stuff from Sephora?
17. Oh yeah. ME.
18. Wow, that's so much money.
19. *shrugs* TREAT YO SELF.
20. I spent so much in Sephora.
21. But that highlighting pallet, though.
22. I have to get my mom a gift.
23. This place is just as bad as Target.
24. This line is SO long.
25. Wait. There's a shorter line?!
26. Okay. Mom's gift is finally done. Now Dad's.
27. Wow. This place smells like body odor.
28. I just need one thing.
29. Don't touch me. Don't touch me. Don't touch me.
30. His gift is finished. YAS.
31. Now lunch.
32. A 5-mile drive is going to take 5-EVER.
33. SO. MUCH. TRAFFIC.
34. YES. SIR. JUST CUT ME OFF.
35. The light isn't going to get any greener, people!
36. Don't hit me. This is my stepdad's car.
37. "PULL UP IN THE MONSTER/ AUTOMOBILE GANGSTER..."
38. I have the right-of-way, ma'am!
39. I'm parking as far away as possible. I don't even care. I will just walk.
40. It is cold af.
41. This food is everything I wanted.
42. Do I want to go to Ulta? YES.
43. They have the brow liner and the contour pallet.
44. My checking account is going to cry, but this is so nice.
45. I need to go home before I buy anything else.
46. Wow. I just love traffic.
47. Okay, I'm further away from the mall. No more traffic.
48. I spent way too much money today.
I love the holiday season, but I really do hate shopping during this time. Everything is a mess, everyone is scrambling to get their last minute purchases, and people are arguing in the toy aisle for the last doll. Next year I will do my shopping a few weeks earlier.
