“Am I drunk, yet?”
“I need to drink enough so that when all of the decent alcohol runs out I can handle the cheap stuff."
“Wow, I am definitely not drunk enough for that, yet.”
“Whose room can I hang out in without feeling completely awkward?”
“That room has loud music. A lot of voices. To that room!”
“Ugh, what is she doing here?!”
“Why is this table so sticky?"
“But seriously, what is she doing here? I thought they broke up."
“I could never live in a frat house, these bathrooms are disgusting.”
“Of course, no toilet paper. What did I expect?"
“Am I the only person who rips the cardboard toilet paper roll to use when there’s no toilet paper?”
“No soap, either. Perfect.”
“This bathroom’s germs are really the last thing I want colonizing on my hands."
“(Insert friend’s name) better not talk to him tonight."
“How can I ask this person for some of their drink, without making it seem like I only want their drink?”
“Oh, look, an unattended bottle. Quick, before the owner sees us!”
“Damn, they definitely need to go home.”
“It’s not even 11 p.m. and we’ve already got a crier.”
“There’s the guy that likes all of my Instagram pictures. I should definitely go say hi.”
“Wow, that was weird.”
"I don’t think he’ll be liking any more of my pictures."
“Ew, why is everything so sticky?"
“I want to dance!”
“Why am I the only one dancing?”
“Looks like I’m the only fun one here."
“I’m dancing by myself and I look good. God, I’m so fun."
“No chaser left; here comes death.”
“Don’t make a disgusted face. Don’t make a disgusted face. Don’t make a disgusted face."
“Yup, that was just as gag-worthy as I thought."
"There goes (friend's name), talking to him like she promised she wouldn’t.”
“Am I blacked out yet?”
“I want to take pictures. I really like my outfit tonight.”
“I hope the picture looks like I’m carefree and an effortless great time.”
“Nope. I just look drunk."
“I hope whoever’s room this is doesn’t care that I’m laying in their bed.”
“I really just need to breath for five minutes. They should understand.”
“Why is my phone so sticky?!”
“Alright, I better go find (friend’s name) and pull her away from that guy before it’s too late.”
“Oh, great, the door’s locked. It’s definitely too late.”
“Alright, I tried to get her. She can’t get mad at me for leaving without her.”
“My phone is dying. I cannot be stuck at a frat house with a dying phone.”
“Also, my liver will never forgive me if I don’t go home, now."
“Maybe my roommate will pick me up if I offer to buy fast food.”
“Yes! My roommate is so bae. Jack In the Box here I come!”
“That is definitely my last party for a while.”
