I’m not necessarily referring to our classes. The ones that we dread attending, and make us gag like you do walking past a garbage can, the ones that send a shiver down our spine when we go to check our grades. I’m not really talking about those at all…

(Although… they aren’t that fun either…)

I’m talking about what I refer to as the “periods of suck.” The times when we are so beaten down, defeated, and broken. The times when that one person wasn’t the person you thought you knew, that time you felt neglected, taken advantage of. That time you had a mild panic attack reading the words “internship,” “full time position,” or “12:00am,” when the quiz was due at 11:59pm. The time you may have sobbed so hard you inadvertently peed a little. The times where you were exhausted to the point of delirium.

Let’s face the reality at hand: the four years you spend in college will likely contain some of the best moments of your life… and while I hate to be the bearer of bad news, they’ll also contain some of the worst. I don’t say this to scare people, or to seem like a pessimistic, ungrateful moron. I say this because during my time in college, some of the worst imaginable moments have occurred. Things have happened to me, to my family and loved ones, to my friends. Don’t cue “Cry Me A River” just yet; believe me, I’m aware that things could be much worse. And in fact, it’s that exact saying that gets me through the periods of suck. And it should be yours, too.

The truth is, college has to kick our asses a little bit. How can we expect to survive in the highly competitive workforce we are being launched into if we don’t get beat up a little beforehand? College has to kick our asses because we need to know the value of a real friend, the comfort of a healthy relationship, the sadness of defeat, the feeling of failure, the calm after the storm. We have to know these things to get through this crazy thing called life. Thus, we form resilience. We learn from our mistakes… and the more we know, the more we grow.

Let me be clear: I cannot focus on the unfortunate times I’ve experienced in college without mentioning (and being incredibly grateful for) the good ones. They’re a twofer really; they go hand-in-hand. You can’t quite have one without the other. Because every single miserable thing that has happened to myself, my family, or my friends, has been followed by a remarkable thing. Typically, this comes in the form of knowledge. I learn more about myself every single time I bomb a quiz (which doesn’t happen that much – relax, Mom), or I watch my loved ones in pain, or experience a trauma. I learn more about myself in those defining moments following; they make or break you, they test you, they make you you. I once saw this quote hanging in my Dad’s office about how life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react. Cry when you need to. Be angry for a little bit. Heck, maybe even throw yourself the tiniest of pity parties. Then move on. Learn from it, take all the knowledge you’ve gained from that experience, and tuck it away in your back pocket for next time. Because there will be a next time. Life is constructed of tiny moments and emotions that never last. Bear with the sorrow, grief, and anger when it comes, because it will. Bear with the resentment and sourness when it comes, because it will. Bear with the anxiety, depression, whatever you are facing. But also, live knowing that happiness and joy will come, and they, too, will be temporary. In these incredible, joyful moments we are molded into much more grateful human beings. And gratefulness is what our world needs, now more than ever.

So let college kick your ass. Let the bad stuff in, don’t ignore it or suppress it. It is here to teach you something, and only you know what that something is.

Chances are, it’s probably worth knowing.