4 Years Later And It's Not Any Easier | The Odyssey Online
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4 Years Later And It's Not Any Easier

"I will carry you with me until I see you again."

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4 Years Later And It's Not Any Easier

As the anniversary of the day you were taken way too soon appraoched, I could not help but reminisce on each and every one of the memories I have ever had with you. I would not trade any of these memories for the world, as they are the reason I smile from ear to ear when I hear your name.

September 14th, 2012.

The day my life changed forever.

The day that my heart was broken into a million small pieces. The day that Midway High School and Spivey's Corner was changed forever. I remember exactly what I was doing when I heard the horrible news about your death. It was a Friday night. We had an open week, meaning no Friday night football. I was at church. I was at Judgment House in a building with absolutely no service. I was sitting on the floor in my scene talking to another actor in my room. I heard a knock at my door and suddenly my mom entered the room. She had a blank look on her face and I knew automatically something was up. She approached me and looked at me for a few seconds. She couldn’t find the words to say to me. She finally was able to say, “Mack has been in a tragic accident and has died.” Those last two words broke my heart forever. I broke down. I couldn't hold in the tears. I was unable to finish my scene and mom took me home. Those few days that followed your death were the hardest days. I laid in bed and wouldn't leave my room unless it was an emergency. I wouldn't talk to anyone, not even my family. I was numb. I was in a dark place that took a long time to get out of. I refused to go to school the week after you died because it was just too hard to bare the pain. Not seeing you was just so hard. I'll never forget your funeral. I couldn't hold back the tears. Your funeral was the saddest event I've attended. You made such an impact in our community. I remained in this dark place for a few months after you passed. My mind just couldn’t grasp the concept of “death” especially since it was dealing with a forever friend.


Every year, when September rolls around, I can't help but to think about your impact on my life and our school. You had so many friends that loved and cared about you. Our friend group goes to your grave each and every year for the anniversary of your death and your birthday.

Moving off to college has made it harder for me to go and visit your grave. Not being able to be there today breaks my heart. September 14th will always be a day that breaks my heart over and over again. I will never understand why you left so soon. I will never understand why you died in such a tragic way. I know God had a greater plan for you life, and that is what I cling to.


Mack,

Thank you so much for all that you taught me all those years we were friends. Thank you for making an impact on my life that will never go away, even though you are gone. I miss you more than words describe. As your mother often tells me, "But we know WHO holds him and WHO holds the future, and that gives us comfort."

The words “gone too soon” will always fit this situation. I will continue to cope with your death, although it will be extremely hard. It never gets easier, even after four years. I love you, Mack, more than words can ever describe. Thank you for being you. You lived a great life and I am so glad I had the ability to be a part of it. The hyphen found on your gravestone represents the life you lived. It is one of the most important symbols. I am so glad I could be a part of your hyphen.

Thanks for being my guardian angel.

I love you, Mack.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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