Loving ourselves is hard. With hectic schedules, false expectations thrown at us from culture and attempts to keep friendships and relationships alive, we rarely have time for ourselves. We wake up with the intention to get through the day, we do our best to be successful and we hope that the slump we’re in will soon pass. That is the worst thing you can do. When life has tired you out, you need to take a step back and love yourself. These are a few things that have helped me and many others. My suggestion is to relax and invest yourself to restore the joy you feel like you’re missing!
1. Stop being so critical of yourself.
Why is it that after every decision, every look in the mirror or every interaction with others, we immediately pummel ourselves with self-judgment? “Maybe I shouldn’t have taken this new job.” “I really wish my thighs weren’t so big.” “Was that the right thing to say?” For one moment, just stop thinking, take a deep breath and relax. You are human, and it’s OK that you’re sometimes unsure of yourself, but for once just allow yourself to just live.
2. Don’t put your self worth in others.
Radio and TV personality Gene Amole said, “The sunrise, of course, doesn’t care if we watch it or not. It will keep on being beautiful, even if no one bothers to look at it.” Shine with every ounce of who you are, despite who pays attention or who doesn’t. If you were created to love playing sports, then play your sport. If you like creating things, bring every idea in your mind to life. If you like dancing around in your car by yourself, then have a blast! If we start doing things with the hopes of someone noticing and complimenting us, we’re no longer living our life for us. We have given up our joy and put it in the hands of others who can steal it at any moment. Plus, you’re really cool. Inventory all the things that make you who you are and begin celebrating them each day! I can promise your outlook on life will change.
3. Learn how to say no.
I can speak from complete experience here. Saying no is the most freeing thing you can ever learn how to do! You don’t have to do something when it’s asked of you just because that hour is available on your calendar. In addition to saying no, you can say no and not give any explanation! If you don’t want to drive someone to work or go out to dinner just say no! It doesn’t make you a jerk, it makes you wise. I completely wrecked my life trying to do everything that was asked of me. When I relinquished some of my commitments, I began to be much happier day to day.
4. Treat yo' self!
Treating yourself looks different for everyone! For me, it’s taking myself out to sushi, buying new makeup or sitting in my clean house with a candle lit and an episode of "Gossip Girl." Everyone has things that can bring them joy, and sometimes you just need to do those things! When you feel worn down by people, this is especially helpful. Who better to invest in you than you?
All of these are things I’ve done or am in the process of teaching myself, and the way it has impacted my life is wonderful. I live daily with more love for myself and the journey I’m on. I would highly encourage anyone else to choose one of these things to begin doing this week. I can promise you, loving yourself is the best thing you can ever do!
