Austin, Texas. The capital of what was once an independent country (#texit). We're separated from the rest of the state by our culture, music, and nightlife. Sometimes however, Austinites have to grow up and move to other places. Here are four reasons why growing up in Austin will ruin you for life:
1. You critique all Mexican food from other states.
"You eat your enchiladas with flour tortillas?" "You call that white queso?" "Excuse me, I didn't get any creamy jalapeño." Say goodbye to tres leches, empanadas, and sopapillas. Other states just can't do Mexican like we can. Whether it's green hatch enchiladas from Chuy's or the salsa cart at Guerro's, there's no comparison. When you're out of Texas and all your friends go, "Let's get some Mexican!", you silently wish you could enjoy some "cheese dip" like non-Texans can. You can't eat a meal outside of the state without going, "We don't do that in Texas." The 512 has ruined your ability to enjoy mediocre Mexican like non-Texans.
2. You think it's weird when other cities aren't super health-conscious.
"You mean y'all don't have a Whole Foods or Sprouts?" "Where's your Juiceland?" "You mean y'all don't have a hike and bike trail?" In recent years, Austin has become famous for being uber granola. You can't drive down Lake Austin Blvd. without seeing a million bikers, walkers and joggers. On Saturdays, the hike and bike trail is swarming with runners and their dogs. A summer favorite is paddle boarding on Lady Bird Lake. There are gyms to be found on every corner, and we have almost as much kale per square foot in this city as we have yoga studios. Being an Austinite has ruined you for life because you think it's weird when other cities aren't super fit. You wish you could be like other Americans and their lifestyles. But here you are, drinking your wheatgrass shot.
3. You mention football in every conversation.
"You mean you don't know who DKR is?" "Have you been to a game in the new Kyle Field?" "Have you heard the latest Baylor news?" Big 12 football has become your second language. Although I attend an SEC school, I have two uncles who played for the 1963 Championship team under DKR so I have to give credit where credit's due. In Austin on Saturdays during the fall, the city is packed with tailgaters sharing stories of when TAMU and UT still played each other. As an Aggie raised person who grew up in a burnt orange area, I found myself getting in so many debates at the elementary school lunch table. So if you're from Austin, the way we talk football has ruined you because no one does it like us.
4. You can't relate to hype about music festivals or celebrities in other cities.
"Aww that's cute, you saw Drake? He performed at ACL, SXSW, and kicked off his 'Summer Sixteen Tour' in Austin last night." "You love Matthew McConaughey? My dad saw him at Chipotle one time." "You saw 'The Blind Side'? Sandra Bullock has a house and two restaurants here." We can't help but be a little arrogant about all the famous names that float around our town. The hike and bike trail by Lady Bird Lake always has someone famous jogging along. As far as music and festivals go, you won't be able to enjoy a concert anywhere else. Austin's the live music capital of the world, and celebrities love being able to say they "played Austin". You won't be able to enjoy a small concert when your home town has multiple big names from various genres perform at Stubb's monthly. Whether you want to see ASAP Ferg or Willie Nelson, we've got it all.
Growing up in the 512 has been the most significant thing to happen to my life and it's impacted me in numerous ways. Texas Forever (did I mention "Friday Night Lights" was filmed here too?)
Go Rebs and God bless,
MJS
