If you’re like me, and you made the freshman mistake of scheduling three 8 a.m. calsses your first semester of college, you will understand the excruciating despair that I experience every MWF. You may have thought, “I woke up at 8 a.m. everyday in high school, how bad can it really be?”
No. Stop. I can’t explain it, but for some reason 8 a.m. classes in college are so. much. worse. You may think you're a morning person, or you “like getting an early start to your day," but nope, you’re wrong. To make matters worse, they only get more unbearable as the semester goes on. So, please, for your own sake, just don’t do it.
Here are 35 thoughts I have while walking to my 8 a.m.
1. Why am I awake?
2.How did I get here?
3. This whole walk is a mystery.
4. Where did all the leaves go?
5. Why is it so cold?
6. Why is it so hot?
7. I really need to go to bed earlier.
8. Should I drop out of college?
9. If I drop out now I can still become a stripper.
10. [Two minutes into my walk] I’m not going to make it.
11. I just can’t.
12. If I speed walk I can get there in approximately 7 minutes and 34 seconds.
13. Odds I steal that person’s moped.
14. Odds I hop onto the back of that person’s moped.
15. [Sees person on hover board] ARE YOU INCAPABLE OF WALKING!? Just kidding. I wish I were you.
16. [Silently judges every person that walks by me]
17. I will never understand girls who use purses instead of backpacks.
18. Are you seriously wearing heels?
19. How are you smiling right now?
20. Where do I know that person from?
21. What would happen if I just lay down on this bench for a few minutes?
22. I’m hungry.
23. I need coffee.
24. I need more coffee.
25. I realized I don’t even look both ways when I cross the street anymore.
26. That skateboarder literally almost killed me.
27. How dare you try to walk faster than me?
28. Why are you are walking SO SLOW.
29. I wonder how many people I can pass before I reach that stop sign.
30. What would happen if that bus hit me?
31. Would I have to go to class if that bus hit me?
32. I think that squirrel is out to get me.
33. [Looks at phone. 7:59 a.m.] Is it socially acceptable to start running now?
34. Only three hours, 54 minutes, and 35 seconds until I can go back to sleep.
35. Why did I do this to myself?
So keep this in mind when you're scheduling your classes for next semester, and may the odds be ever in your favor.
