When someone tells you who they are, listen. You've got to believe them. Whether or not they want to acknowledge it the ways in which they communicate through their actions and their words speaks volumes about who they are as a person. Chances are there has been a time where a person has made you feel insecure in a relationship. While your first instinct might be to brush it off because the thought of confrontation terrifies you believe when I say that someone that would continuously hurt you is not someone whose actions or words you should ever try to make excuses for. But, how can you tell this person isn’t who you thought they were? How can you tell your not being overly sensitive or projecting onto them? In this article I'm going to go over three signs that this friend/significant other/ family member may not care for you as much as you care for them.
1. Exclusion:
If this person is constantly keeping you out of social functions, ignoring you and hanging out with others at social events, or ignoring you on social media then they might be trying to exclude you. Keep in mind that you should also make sure that if they are doing this, then you're not the only one. If you're not the only one then maybe this person is going through a hard time and isn't dealing well with it. But if you are the only person it might be suspicious. and call cause for some kind of actions.
2. Projection of emotions:
Do you constantly feel as though an individual might be causing you to feel bad over a situation that they instigated? It's kind of like, two siblings arguing over who broke their parents vase. Child A was holding the vase in the air throwing it around the and playing with it, and Child B bumps into Child A and they drop the vase. Who's at fault? Well Child A might put the blame on Child B, saying “it wouldn't have broken if you didn't push me”. But who’s really at fault? It's the same in other relationships where everything is a game of he said she said. Not only is this ineffective communication, it's rather toxic when you get down to it.
3. Discrepancy between words and Actions.
There's nothing more disheartening than to be told one thing and they have that person treat you the exact opposite. it messes with your ability to trust what people say. If they tell you they care about you and then deliberately do something they know will hurt you, chances are they don't mean what they said. If this is a one off event, definetly say something but don't stress out. If this continuesly happens consider not associating with this person anymore for your own mental health.
So when someone reveals themselve's to be a snake in the grass, you've got to listen to them. I know it hurts, I know you feel like you've been tricked, and I know you feel like you'll never be able to trust someone again. But before you can handle all that you've got to protect yourself. Whether you have to confront them or cut them out of your life you've got to take care of yourself.
We live in an age where everything is online. So it's easy to learn things about each other that you really didn't want to know. All I can say is keep your faith, love yourself, and hold onto the people in your life that do treat you right.
