When it comes to living in the southern Small Town, USA, those of us who were fortunate enough to live here can't imagine living any other way. There's a lot of people who weren't raised this way that eventually move to these towns. I mean, hello? Why wouldn't everybody want to? However, there are some things we're used to that the new folks in our towns have a hard time getting used to. Some people don't understand it, but we figure it's our way of life and if you want to live here, you might want to learn to adjust to these things.
1. The smell of chicken litter. This is how some people make their living. So please don't complain about the smell when that's how they're feeding their family. Also, a lot of farmers put chicken litter on their fields as fertilizer. I don't suggest complaining to them either.
2. Getting stuck behind a tractor when driving down the road. Once again, the farmer on that tractor isn't doing it for fun. It's his life.
3. Cows. The smell of cows. The mooing. The random cow in the road that got through the fence. All of it.
4. A dirty car. You can't keep the outside of your car clean if you live in the country. Sorry.
5. Stopping for funeral processions. Even though this should be protocol every where out of respect, if you don't do it in small, country towns, people instantly lose respect. Nothing grinds my gears like people that keep on driving.
6. Four-wheelers. They're everywhere. Watch out for them.
7. Loud trucks. And loud trucks that come by your house at all hours of the night. They are the pride and joy of teenage boys (and sometimes girls) in these towns.
8. Dealing with your allergies during hay season. It's part of it, y'all.
9. We like guns and we don't like when people threaten to take them. When we say don't tread on us, we mean it.
10. Barking dogs. Everybody has dogs. Most of them are used for hunting. Also, dogs don't really respect property lines around here. Sorry.
11. Roosters will crow every morning. And they are loud.
12. Hard work. It's part of the lifestyle. A lot of a person's reputation is determined by how hard they work.
13. Friday night football. It's the main event during the week in the fall and everybody goes to support. Some towns live and die by the success of their football teams.
14. Everybody knows everybody. Everybody knows everything. That's how it goes. Don't be surprised when your best friend's cousin's ex-boyfriend's grandmother knows your business.
15. The smell of bonfires. It's kind of what we do for fun around here. Don't be alarmed by the smell of smoke of Friday and Saturday nights.
16. Seeing people you know everywhere you go. You can't go to town and not expect to see your cousin, your best friends aunt, and a deacon's wife within five minutes. You should also be prepared to talk to them for anywhere from five minutes to an hour and a half.
17. Learning the language. It's not always easy figuring out what certain sayings mean. And it makes it a lot harder when you're trying to understand a thick southern drawl at the same time. For instance, you need to know that if someone says they're madder than a wet hen, you don't want to mess with them. Also, don't correct someone when they say "ain't". It's a word in towns like this. Don't knock it.
18. Waving at everyone, including people you don't know, while driving. They're going to at least throw up a finger at you, sometimes a full wave. You better wave back. Also, if they pass your house and wave when you're outside, you better wave back then too.
19. Getting your yard rolled. Once again, everybody knows everybody and that means they probably know where you live. Teenagers have to make their own fun somehow.
20. Knowing how to cook at least one good dish or dessert. You're going to get invited to people's houses to eat all the time, especially on Sunday's after church. It's a sin in southern small towns to show up to eat empty handed. But you better make sure it tastes good or they'll let you know it doesn't.
21. Going to decorations, if you have family members buried in the local cemeteries. This isn't as well known as it used to be. However, a lot of southern churches have a Sunday during late spring or early summer where family members buy new flowers for their family members' graves. It's a great time of fellowship and memories. And you've never seen a cemetery look more beautiful. It's something you want to get used to and definitely want to be a part of.
22. Keeping your word. People in small towns don't like people who go back on what they say or liars. A man's word is better than a written contract and that's the way we all believe it should always be.
23. Mosquitos the size of birds. They will find you and they will bite you.
24. Country music. You can't get away from it. It's everywhere: playing at the gas station, playing in Walmart, playing over the loudspeaker at sporting events. Hope you like some George Strait and Garth Brooks.
25. Living the simple life. People down here don't like the hustle and bustle. We know how to really enjoy the simple things in life. After all, it's the simple things in life that make a happy life. And we're all about being happy, y'all.
26. We love God and we're proud of it. We all sin daily, but we know where to go for forgiveness and who to thank every night.
27. A loving community you can count on. No matter what you may go through, the people in these towns are there for you. They'll pick you up when you're down and help you get going again. After all, family isn't always blood.
28. We're proud of our roots. Small town southern folks are proud of where they came from. We're thankful for the way we were raised and wouldn't have it any other way. (Don't knock it until you've tried it.) I'd say we're pretty used to it all, y'all.
