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23 Things You Think When You’re Writing A Long Essay

Besides "why did I wait till the last minute to do this paper?"

Hannah Raye Jeffery
Mar 13, 2017
Alma College
15
23 Things You Think When You’re Writing A Long Essay
Entrepreneur

Sometimes, you just gotta write an essay. Whenever I do, a lot of thoughts usually start floating through my head. I've documented a few for your amusement. Let me know if any of these come to your mind, or if you have some you could add!

1. Would Wikipedia or Google scholar be a better place to start?

2. (1 paragraph in) Wait, I should write my thesis first...

3. (3 pages in) What’s my thesis again?

4. For heaven’s sake, is it illegal to use “I” in an essay?

5. Science majors don’t have to do this… (they do, btw, sorry science majors)

6. Why does it have to be so LONG?

7. I want coffee. No, I need it.

8. I’ll go to bed after this next paragraph.

9. Will the teacher notice if I use a citation generator?

10. I heard if you make the periods 14 pt font, you can lengthen out your essay…should I try it?

11. I’m taking a walk…

12. I’ll go to bed after this other paragraph.

13. All of my friends are having fun. I bet Jason got this done forever ago. You suck, Jason.

14. My Facebook friends must all be so worried about me…

15. I wonder if I can get away with just reading the Sparknotes…

16. Hey, this is pretty good…can I cite Sparknotes?

17. It can’t be healthy to look at a screen for this long.

18. It will all be over soon…(takes nap)

19. I wonder what the weather’s like outside.

20. I’m going for one more walk.

21. This sucks. I’ll probably look back at this and laugh one day. (starts crying)

22. END IT!!!

23. Rats, this thesis doesn’t connect with the rest of my paper!

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