If you've never worked in a restaurant... you have no idea what your servers actually have to deal with on a daily basis. Working in a restaurant will change your entire outlook on life, and going out to eat.
1. "Weekend" means something different
While most people look forward to the weekend so they won't have work, servers patiently await the weekend all week because that's when you make the real money.
2. "I hope we're dead tonight."
We say this at the beginning of every shift, but complain if it is dead and we make no money. That's just life.
3. When you greet a table and they interrupt you
I'm sorry but you're going to listen to me tell you my name first, and then you can have your half hot half cold water with exactly two ice cubes and extra lemon on the side, but no seeds.
4. When you greet a table and they ignore you
Even worse than being interrupted. I guess I'll just walk away now, flag me down when you're ready to order.
5. When customers act like you cooked their food
Look dude, I told them medium rare it's not my fault it's overcooked. I did my part.
6. When customers act like you own the restaurant
"Ma'am, I'm just a server here. I don't make the rules I just follow them."
7. "Is it good?"
I'm going to tell you everything on the menu is good, even if I've never had it and even if I actually hate it more than anything else in the world.
8. Substitutions
"Can I get something instead of-"
"No."
9. "Yes we're ready to order."
But it's been five minutes and I'm still standing here while you decide what you want to eat.... so do you want some more time or...?
10. Campers
No really, sit at my table all night and then after I'm cut so I can't leave! Can I get you some refills for the tenth time?
11. "Can I have some hot water for my silverware?"
Look I know the concept of silverware in a restaurant is gross but I eat off them too and I'm fine so far.
12. Not being able to make plans... ever
Well, I could be off at 7 p.m. or 1 a.m. so we can do something around one of those times.
13. People coming in five minutes before closing
"Hiiiiiii how are y'all doing? By the way, we close in five minutes, but come on in!"
14. Dollar bills
So. Many. Dollar bills. Don't give me that look like I'm a stripper. So what if I am?!
15. Getting change in the middle of a rush
Bye, if anyone needs me I'll be in the weeds.
16. When it takes what feels like ten minutes to authorize every single credit card.
Just when you get out of the weeds too.
17. Weeds. Just weeds in general.
"What do you need?" I don't even know what I need that's how weeded I am.
18. Late night dinners
Yeah we can get dinner tonight if you're cool with eating at 11.
19. Your work family
You spend literally all your time together, even outside of work. They understand the struggles. They're the best, most entertaining group of people you'll ever meet.
20. Fake smiling and laughing
I guess customers don't appreciate my chronic RBF. By the way, that really wasn't a funny joke at all but thanks for trying.
21. Bad tips
Just tip your servers, please. You don't know what we have to deal with.
