1. Your ideal weekend hangout is drinking somewhere in the woods.
Plans? Taken care of. Why spend a night at the movies or walking around the mall when you can get emaciated with your best bros in a forest?
2. When you meet someone not from the area and they ask where you live, it's always "right outside of Philly". How outside? Who cares. It's "all the same".
We all know the most identifiable area around is Philly, and we really like to stretch boundaries.
3. When you're in a relationship, chances are you're also dating 10 other people at the same time.
Nothing says loyalty like treating Nicole like a princess ... and her friends ... and her friends' friends ...
4. You can't survive a day without Wawa.
Aside from friends, family, and football, Wawa has become one of the most important lifelines to you. The very sound of the word Sheetz makes you cringe.
5. Instead of eating on a plate or napkin, your fine dining occurs on the trashcans directly outside of Wawa.
I don't have an explanation for this one. "It's just a Delco thing".
6. You "can't wait to get out of this hellhole", but in reality, you'll probably raise a family there.
All of your life, you have experienced the boring weekends and little to no places to go for entertainment. It's a popular conversation between you and your friends to put down Delco. But guess what? Don't be surprised when you're moving into a house and planning for children in the same location 10 years from now.
7. Tiff Bannister and Anthony Quairoli are household names.
From porn star sensation to undisputed champion Mr. Slide in your DM's, these two are undoubtedly your claim to fame. Interboro, like the rest of Delco, boasts a fine variety of distinguished individuals.
8. You pregame concerts at the Susquehanna Bank Center 6 months in advance.
Remember when people went to concerts to actually see the artists playing? Me neither. It wouldn't be a Delco takeover without Vinny passing out on the lawn before the concert starts and Kim, who drinks vodka like water, telling her friends she "really loves them" all night long.
9. You see more Confederacy flags hanging out of pickup trucks than you do in the South.
Donald Trump is hailed as an all-mighty god. Luke Bryan is blasting out of everyone and their mother's stereo system. Mississippi River to the eastern shores? Pretty sure the Civil War was fought in Ridley Township. Checkmate, historians.
10. The farthest you have traveled is to the ancient lands of Philadelphia for the weekend.
All of us have gotten the "Philly for the weekend?" text at least a couple times ... or a couple hundred times ...
11. Every possible chance you get to visit the Jersey Shore, you take it.
Spring Break? Summer? In-service day? Aunt's funeral? Doesn't matter. GTL.
12. Your refrigerator is constantly full with gallons of Tea Cooler.
Otherwise known as "Delco Crack", this iced tea/lemonade mix puts Arnold Palmer's to shame.
13. Under-age house parties are held on a weekly basis.
Last resolution, you surely know a poorly-planned shindig is going down on a Friday night. You just have to find out where.
14. You see a PT Cruiser, Mercedes-Benz, and a man riding a unicycle all within the same mile.
Delco boasts a wide variety of incomes and commodities. The only transportation I have yet to see is horse-and-buggy, but my faith down the road is alive.
15. Your proper English is such a lost cause, people swear you're from a different country.
In Delco, "keeping it a bean", "get fed the hands", and "looking like a snack" are commonplace sayings.
16. Swiss Farms is the royal savior of all businesses.
Spread throughout the heart of Delco, Swiss Farms is the only drive-thru grocery store in America.
17. When you meet someone else from Delco, you instantly form an unbreakable bond.
It has gotten to a point where everyone in Delco might as well be your second family. Delconians stick together.
18. "Come on Eileen" is the most played song at family/social gatherings.
What is a graduation party without this legendary tune? It will get everyone moving, even Granny.
19. Your most common social media post is "hmu" or "what's the look?"
There is never a surplus of things to do, and even though we know nothing comes out of posting the same thing over and over again, we still love doing it.
20. You can't leave the house without a backward hat & a Monster energy drink.
Swagger and brand-name are two adjectives that define Delco best. Gotta look good for the Insta pic.
21. You take pride in being one of the most unique species on planet Earth.
Above all else, Delconians are proud of where they come from. Through weird tendencies, illegal motivations, and downright true stereotypes, we are a family. And we wouldn't have it any other way.
