College introduces you to a wide variety of people. The general rule of thumb is that the larger your lecture, the more variety you get. You're bound to meet interesting people that will make you wonder how they got this far in life.
1. The Arguer
I want to know why your undergrad self thinks that you're smarter than your professor with a PhD in the field you are taking the class in.
2. The Person Who Doesn't Cover Their Mouth
IT IS FLU SEASON AND YOU ARE DISGUSTING.
3. The Commenter
"Uh huh," "yeah," "OHHHH." This is an hour long class of just hearing our professor lecturing and you commenting on everything is not making this go by faster.
4. The Person Who Takes Your Seat
The only constant thing in my life is my lecture seat. Please don't take this away from.
5. The Person Who Approaches the Person Who Took Their Seat
It's one thing to bottle up whatever you're feeling about a chair, but actually approaching someone is messed up. It's not that deep.
6. The Person Who Just Sits There
I don't know why this person annoys me. There's just something about someone not taking notes, on their laptop, on their phone, or talking but sitting there doing nothing that's off.
7. The Person Eating Noisy Food
Granola bars? Cool. Muffins? Fantastic. Berries? Fine. Carrots, chips, pretzels? No.
8. The Person with Smelly Food
Garlic pasta is great. I'm a fan. Not in enclosed spaces.
9. The Person Who Doesn't Shower
We're all busy. I get it. I really do. But takes 10 minutes out of your day, preferably everyday or every other day, to be a person.
10. The Tall Person Who Sits in the Front and Now I Can't See
You can stop sitting front and center but I can't help being the size of a middle schooler.
11. The Creepshotter
Yeah there are weird kids in every lecture. But you're not slick. We can all see you. You're now the weird kid. You played yourself.
12. "I Don't Have a Pen, Paper, or My Laptop"
If you're in college, I'm going to make a wild assumption you've probably needed school supplies for at least fifteen years now.
13. The Person Who Messages Everyone in the Class About Self-Promotion
"Hey guys, I found this great new resource and..." Please stop.
14. The Person Who Shoots You Down When You Ask for Notes
"Maybe you should've been in class." MAYBE THE FLU SHOULDN'T EXIST AND THEN I WOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN SICK BUT WE CAN'T ALL GET WHAT WE WANT, EMMA.
15. The Person Who Refuses to Use a Tissue
No one wants to hear you sniffle. God, you make me so angry.
16. The Person Who Doesn't Care What Everyone Can See on Their Laptop
One of my classes required us to sign up for teams on a Google Doc when most of us didn't know each other. This guy in the front row proceeded to Facebook stalk everyone in the class. We could all see.
17. The Person Who Constantly Complains About Taking GenEds
If I can sit through this class on the art history of ancient Mesoamerica, so can you.
18. The Person Who Doesn't Pay Attention and then Asks the Professor 382 Questions
"PROFESSOR, PROFESSOR, PROFESSOR"
19. The Person Chewing Gum with Their Mouth Open
If you're old enough to go to college, you're old enough to behave like a civilized member of society.
20. The Person Who Uses The Odyssey as a Platform to Complain
No one cares. The absolute worst type of person. Disgusts me.
