20 Things I've Learned By 20 Years Old

20 Things I've Learned By 20 Years Old

To you, from me.

Another year older, another year wiser; or at least that's what they tell me. Throughout my years on planet Earth, I've picked up a thing or two. Some things that I've learned have been a larger process than others, but each lesson is valuable nonetheless. So, from me to you, here are 20 things I've learned throughout my 20 years of life.

1. Don’t be afraid to be yourself. If people don’t like you for you, they don’t need to be a part of your life.

2. There will always be someone smarter than you, skinnier than you, funnier than you, etc. and that’s okay. Comparison of yourself amongst other people can break you. Don't forget your worth.

3. The person you date in high school probably won't be the person you end up marrying. My mom told me this multiple times and I just smiled and nodded, thinking she was wrong. She wasn’t.

4. Finding your place in the world takes a long time, but once you accept the fact that where you are now is where you are supposed to be, it gets easier.

5. You are worth way more than the numbers in your life. You’re worth more than the amount of calories you’ve eaten in a day, the number on the scale, the people you’ve dated. Numbers don’t define you.

6. Letting go of a person you still care about is one of the hardest things you’ll have to face in life.

7. Turning to someone or something else to numb the pain will only make the pain worse. Suffer through it and become strong again.

8. Everyone grows at their own rate. You can't force someone to have the same mindset at you, people have to develop on their own.

9. You aren’t under an obligation to go out every night, even if it’s what “normal” college kids do.

10. Your mom and dad love you more than you know, even if they don’t always show it.

11. People say “I love you” in different ways.

12. If you’re the only one putting effort into a relationship, it’s time for that relationship to end. Don’t give someone the time of day if they can’t sacrifice a minute to talk to you.

13. You shouldn’t rely on other people for your own happiness.

14. Good grades matter, but so does your mental health. Don’t stress yourself out to the point of complete exhaustion just so you can make an A on your biology final.

15. It's okay to cry, don't apologize for the way you're feeling. Ever.

16. Your first intuition about someone is usually right, but always be willing to give a person a chance first.

17. You can’t do the same thing every day and call that a life. Exploring the world you live in will be much more rewarding than sitting at home watching TV.

18. Second chances usually lead to disappointment and regret. If you're disappointed because you gave someone or some thing a second chance, don't continue to give them third, fourth, or fifth chances.

19. Stop being afraid of what will happen if you do something controversial. Be your own person. Live by your own rules.

20. You don’t have to have everything figured out by age 20.

Cover Image Credit: Hannah Clarke

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it


Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

Cover Image Credit: wordpress.com

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My First College Gal Pal Road Trip Was Amazing

Every girl should have one good girls trip.


In some way or another, everybody has a list of things they want to do in their lives before it's all over. After all, we're human. There's adventure to be had in every life. One thing I have always wanted to do before I grew too old and grey was go on a road trip with my gal pals to the beach. A couple weeks ago, I achieved this memorable milestone, and it allowed me to open up to new surroundings and experiences.

On this trip, I went with two of my friends from college, Kait and Lindsey, to visit my roommate Elizabeth in Virginia Beach. This was pretty big for Lindsey and I because neither of us had been to Virginia Beach before. Thankfully Elizabeth and Kait knew their way around the city, so we never got lost on our way to and fro.

Like most vacations, my favorite parts probably took place at the beach. I'm always at utter peace stomping through mushy sand or leaning down to splash the salty water that tries to knock my short self over. We took pictures and did something us college girls rarely have time to do especially in school: Relax.

The four of us did not live up to the crazed stereotype of girl trips in movies. Although I finally got a chance to sing along to Taylor Swift in a car ride with my friends, so that's always a plus. We played "Top Golf" one day, and by some miracle, I actually won the second game by a fair amount after much humiliation in the first one. We visited some of Elizabeth's family, and I finally got to meet her giant dog Apollo (I call him 'Wolf Dog'). Everyday was another chance to ask with enthusiasm: "So what are we doing today?"

Our trip wasn't like the movies where we all cried or confessed our deepest darkest secrets. Everything the four of us shared was laughter and this calm feeling of being at home, in the chaotic peace of each other's company. We understand each other a little better due to finally seeing what we're like outside of Longwood University. After this, all I can say is that we're most definitely planning the next one!

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