This Tuesday, I turn twenty.
It's a milestone that feels like it's been both a long and a short time coming, and it's surreal to believe that I won't be a teenager anymore. Becoming an adult during such uncertain and scary times can be difficult to wrap your head around, but I've been lucky enough to learn a great deal so far in my life. Here are some of my favorite lessons.
1. Always be kinder than you need to be.
Whether we like to admit it or not, the world can be an ugly and divided place. There are so many things that are out of our control, but taking the time to compliment a stranger or volunteer your time can have lasting, positive effects.
2. Never stop learning.
Learning should never stop after graduation. Reading, doing your research, and engaging in conversations with others can help you to grow and make more empathetic, informed decisions throughout your life.
3. Never take your loved ones for granted.
People who will truly love and support you unconditionally can be far and in between. This doesn't excuse when they treat you poorly or make bad decisions, but taking the time to cherish your loved ones and be there for them in return is one of the most filling, rewarding things that you can do.
4. Dogs and cats are both good.
5. Passion is key.
No matter what you choose to do in your life, having passion can motivate you and give you something for which to fight and work. Without these passions, life can easily become mundane and lost meaning.
6. You are not other people's perception of you.
Humans are inherently social creatures, and it's easy to base your self-esteem on how well you're received by those around you. When it comes down to it, though, no one truly knows you but yourself. We all see glimpses of each other, and trusting your own gut can help you much more than living for someone else's approval.
7. It's okay to cry.
I spent a lot of years bottling up and ignoring my feelings. It might seem easier to do this at first, but letting yourself feel and address what's going in your life head on can drastically improve your personal life, relationships, and mental health.
8. Social media doesn't tell the whole story.
In such a digital age, it's so easy to judge and compare your own life in comparison to people's Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook posts. But, as hard as it can be to remember, these are only the highlights and glamorized moments of their lives. Everyone is dealing with something, and their worth is equal to yours.
9. Sometimes you just need to eat the McDonald's.
Life's short, and enjoying junk food in moderation is worth it. Eating healthily and exercising are important, but know when to give yourself a break.
10. Dream big, but work harder.
Having dreams is an incredible thing that can play a huge role in your attitude and the course of your life. But, these goals are only as good as the work that you are willing to put in to make them a reality. Dreams without concrete effort are nice thoughts, but nothing more than that.
11. Leggings are pants.
Honestly. Love yourself.
12. Take time to get to know people who are different from you.
So much of the hatred and division in our society could be solved if we took the time to get to know people who are not in the same demographic as us, instead of relying on stereotypes and media portrayal.
13. Make time for yourself.
14. Treat yo self (but don't go overboard).
Some days are tough, and treating yourself (whether it's food, new clothes, or new experiences) almost always helps. Just make sure you're not treating yourself to $7 coffee every day.
15. Don't compromise your beliefs.
These days, it can seem like you'll be torn apart on social media, or even alienated in real life, if you do not agree with other people's values and opinions on issues. But, when people's rights and humanity are at stake, sticking up for what you believe is right will have a more lasting impact. Staying silent and going alone with something just because those around you believe it is unfair to your personhood and others'.
16. Support other women.
From the time we're very young, we're taught to take pride in "not being like other girls" and valuing more masculine traits and activities. But, other ladies are pretty awesome and can be some of the best support systems and inspirations that you'll ever have. Women still have a great deal of prejudice and oppression to overcome, and that fight becomes a little easier when we're there for each other.
17. Coffee shops are the best creativity boosters.
Studies show that coffee shops can boost your creativity and make brainstorming easier. Getting out of your normal work environment and enjoying coffee and bouncing ideas off of others can be a refreshing and fun approach to take.
18. Plan ahead, but appreciate where you're at.
From internships to travel opportunities, looking ahead and having some idea of what you want in the future gives you a much better chance at actually accomplishing these things. But, only focusing on where you want to be can come at the cost of lots of important moments and relationships that are in your life right now.
19. Flowers make everything better.
Personal favorites: sunflowers, roses, and lavender.
20. Be open.
To new experiences, ideas, people, and places. Life isn't meant to be lived in one place, mindset, or with one group of people.
The past few decades have been a wild ride, and I hope that the next one will be full of opportunities, friendship, and new experiences. Have a great rest of your own year!
