I’m a twin. An identical twin. A freak of nature, or maybe a “miracle,” but probably a freak.
This is the only interesting thing about me so I thought I’d write about it. Last week in the first week of classes, alike in the other 13 years of school, when a teacher hands out the dreaded “Getting to Know You” papers, I have always responded to the "tell us something interesting about yourself" with “I’m a twin.”
If I know anything, I know about being a twin due to my 19 years of first hand research. Looking at my life, there are many moments and lessons I’ve taken for granted about being a twin that are actually strange or simply awesome. Here are some:
1. Waving at someone you don’t know
This is one new struggle of being a twin in college. Strangers walk towards me, waving, and I have to wave back. While it's against my awkward nature and the lesson of stranger danger, I do it anyway. I do this not to be friendly, but because I fear my twin will not look friendly. So I wave to people that I guess think I am my twin, and pay the consequence of additional awkwardness if I was wrong.
2. Continuing on in a conversation you didn’t start
In addition to waving at people at times who don’t know me but know my twin, I’ve also learned how to pretend to be in a conversation I never was in to begin with. At times, someone both twins know will come up and start a confusing conversation with you. When you realize they started this conversation with your twin, you’re often too late into the conversation to back down. My advice in this petrifying situation is to subtly end the conversation quickly and and walk away, even if you are now walking in the opposite direction of your next class.
3. How to back down from a fight on purpose
I know my twin very well. I’ve been nearby or told frequently about most moments of her life. But despite this, we don’t fight often. We can be honest but have learned to not say everything we want to. It’s kind of like knowing the self-destruct button and choosing not to push it. I think because of this we’ve never fought for longer than an hour or two in an awkward cold war standoff of sorts.
4. Being fair
In the world of quantitative competition in standardized tests and competitive sports, it's hard not to judge your worth down to the fraction. But I'd argue competition with a twin is the hardest and at times most dangerous form of competition. As a twin I strive to be defined as different but equal.This is a very hard perception of competition and in action it’s even harder. It's hard to be an individual while also not feeling guilty whenever anything good happens to you, but I'm working on it. Throughout the years, you accept what your twin is better than you at and what areas you are more successful. Luckily, in school and dance we were about as equal as you can be while pushing each other to succeed and improve.
5. Introductions scare you
This may just be my nature, but introducing myself seems like I’m lying. Without my twin Megan I feel like a one part act. It's weird when part of who you are is being a twin. But at the same time, introductions become easier because when people know you, they know your twin by extension due to how annoyingly often I reference her in conversations.
6. You don’t have to be alone
New to a school? Going to the store? Going to a party? I mean I don’t really go to parties. But when I do, being a twin comes in handy. She is my living and breathing form of a “pretend to have a call so I look like I have a friend.”
7. You always have someone to really be honest with you
A twin, like any long-standing best friend, will always support you and more importantly will call you out. For example, Megan reads all of my articles to let me know if the idea is stupid and lets me know where they can improve. As a twin, you always have someone who can give you the best advice. I know my twin very well, and vice versa. It’s awesome to have someone who knows you so well that can put you in your place, support you, and let you know rationally if you can do something.
8. You have double the friends
While this isn’t really true- in theory, it could be. At college, I’ve met some of my best friends here through Megan. Because anyone she likes, I like, friendships become obvious and easy.
9. You’re at your best around her
While I probably shouldn’t spend 24 hours a day with my twin, I could. We don’t live in the same dorm as freshmen because we believed that would be too easy. I enjoy spending time with her doing nothing but sitting and being our most annoying selves. Other people need alone time to “recharge”. I need time with my twin.
10. You just pretend you’re your twin
Whether you’re tired of correcting people calling you by the wrong name or just want an inside joke of the day, every identical twin has done this. It’s fun to see the look on confused faces who aren’t entirely sure if you’re your twin or not. At the same time, looking like your twin can have consequences. Let’s just say I’ve learned to get yelled at (and praised) in sports for something my twin did.
11. I have a best friend for life
The best part about being a twin is the fact that she is your favorite person. I've literally "known her for forever." There’s nothing she could do to not be my friend (which is super cool because I can suck sometimes). She’s always there to laugh at your jokes, keep you on track, and sympathize.
So thanks Megan, for every moment and lesson you've taught me.
