17 Struggles of a People-Pleaser
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17 Struggles of a People-Pleaser

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17 Struggles of a People-Pleaser

1. You live in constant fear that everyone is mad at you.



2. Making decisions for the group is impossible.

You just want to make everyone happy, so when someone asks what movie to watch, where to go to dinner, or which activity to do, you say, "It doesn't matter". Then everyone hates you anyway for not being decisive enough, and you're back to square one.


3. This is you: "What's wrong? Are you mad at me? Why aren't you talking? Did I do something wrong?"

Your friend replies: "NO, BUT IF YOU KEEP ASKING, SOMETHING WILL BE WRONG!" You quietly run away as fast as possible.

4. You've never used the word "no."

In fact, it's probably not even in your vocabulary. So when you don't want to do something, but you do it anyway, you just nod your head like…

5. You help your friends with their work so much, that you forget about your own.

6. You laugh at jokes even when they're not funny.

Why not?

7. You give out compliments like free candy.

It's gotten to the point where people don't even accept them anymore.


8. Scrolling through Instagram is a nightmare.

Why did they make it so that people can see what you like? You find yourself "heart"-ing every single picture on your feed, in fear that someone will confront you for not liking their photo.

9. Confrontation is tantamount to the plague.

You avoid it at all costs, even if that means hiding in a bathroom stall.

10. You say "I love you" much more than what is socially acceptable.

What's even weirder is that you say it to strangers more than you say it to your best friends. Your best friends know that you love them, where as this person you just met could think you're evil for not being nice and saying it.

11. You buy people presents even though you're poor. When you see something that reminds you of someone, you just have to buy it. It will make them so happy. But you're running out of money....


12. You're so busy worrying about everyone else that you have no idea what you want to do with your life. Your mom thinks you'd make a great doctor, but your dad thinks you'd make a great lawyer. Your teachers think you should be a writer, but your heart is telling you to drop out of school and join the Peace Corps. But what will make everyone happy?!



13. You never get the last slice of cake. You really want it, but you don't want anyone to be mad at you for taking it, so you just watch with envy as they eat your happiness.


14. When people don't answer your texts or calls, you truly believe that you've done something terribly wrong and they hate you, or that they're dead.


15. At the end of the day, you replay every conversation you've had to make sure you were nice. If you get the feeling that you said something off-kilter, you immediately send a page-long apology to the person.

16. When people don't use emojis and exclamation points in their texts to you, you feel like you've just received hate mail.


17. Writing professional e-mails basically gives you a heart attack. Why isn't it okay to insert smiley faces so they don't think you're mad at them? They probably think you're rude and insensitive. Ugh, don't hit send!

While being a people-pleaser has its downfalls, all in all, it's a good thing. Being there for other people, and being an overall friendly person means that others are friendly to you in return. You know -- or at least hope -- that your friends will always be there for you in the same ways that you're there for them. Plus, your bossy friends love you because they always get to do what they want! And isn't the goal of being a people-pleaser getting everyone to love you? Yep! However, it's necessary to stand your ground on some matters. Never forget that your well-being is an essential part of contributing to others' well-being. Don't be a rug that gets walked on, but rather, just love others to the best of your ability, and most importantly, love yourself.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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