Working out always sounds so appealing until you actually do it. You are always envious and confused by the girls who spend three hours a day on a treadmill (Where are you running to?). Regardless, you wish you enjoyed the gym as much as that treadmill girl but the struggles are too real.
1. You want to look like this:
2. But you don’t want to have to do this:
3. Running is a form of punishment that you will never be caught doing. Ever. Unless it’s away from a serial killer or something.
4. Work-out clothes are so cute but it’s so obvious that you only wear them for show. You now have to start actually attending the gym so people don’t catch onto your tricks.
5. You miss out on social dates where your friends all laugh and do crunches together. Like are they even real people? Who laughs mid sit-up?
6. You really want to eat that pizza at 4 a.m. but then you’ll have to work out in the morning so is it even really worth it (yes)?
7. Paying for a gym membership seems kind of useless considering you’ll probably only ever show up three times.
8. All you want is Nicki Minaj’s butt, Kim Kardashian’s boobs, and Gisele Bundchen’s body. Is that too much to ask for?
9. New Year’s Resolutions to start working out more last approximately one gym attendance.
10. But watching the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show shames you enough into actually struggling your way to the gym the next morning.
11. But when you finally get there, you look like a lost puppy. What are those for? How do you work this machine? Is it obvious that you’re subtly trying to read the directions?
12. And when is a socially acceptable time to leave the gym? Is 20 minutes long enough?
13. It’s only slightly embarrassing when the man next to you is lifting twice your weight and you are trying to disguise your struggle with the five-pounders.
14. Time actually travels backwards when you’re at the gym. There is no way you’ve only been doing this treadmill for four minutes. The clock has to be wrong, right?
15. Feeling better after working out has to be some sort of myth. Who ever feels chipper after running 10 miles dripping with sweat?
16. Finally after one gym day, you reward yourself with an entire pizza and a whole year off from the gym. Hey, it’s the thought that counts right?
