16 Questions About Being Transgender That People Were Too Afraid To Ask
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Politics and Activism

16 Questions About Being Transgender That People Were Too Afraid To Ask

Sometimes the questions that you have, just don't feel like the 'okay' ones to ask

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16 Questions About Being Transgender That People Were Too Afraid To Ask
Autumn Grove

Have you ever had questions about something, but were to afraid to ask out of fear of being offensive? I gave total strangers, and people close to me the ability to anonymously ask any question that they had about anything transgender related but were maybe too scared to. Here are my answers!

Q: When does a "typical" FtM trans person usually attempt top surgery? When will you?

A: This is a tough question. There is really no solid timeline of when people will try and get top surgery. It depends a lot on access to surgeons, insurance costs, ability to take the time off for recovery, etc. However, ideally, I would like to have my top surgery before I graduate from college.

Q:How did it feel when you were a kid? did you know you were trans exactly or did something just feel off?

A: When I was a kid, I had no idea I was trans. I was perfectly content in my swishy dresses and sparkly tops. Into middle school I started wearing more gender neutral clothes because I was more comfortable in them. I didn't really start feeling different until puberty, when I realized that what my body was going through wasn't what I thought it was supposed to. I was jealous of my male friends who were getting deep voices and muscles, when I got breasts and a period.

Q:What is it like getting your period every month?

A: It's awful. There is nothing more emasculating than getting your period. It throws me into the worst mood and brings about a lot of feelings of not "really" being a man. However, I have gone this whole month without my period so if I make through to next month without it, it means that the testosterone has shut it down which is super exciting.

Q: What gender do you like more?

A: So I am gonna go out on a limb here and assume that you mean what gender do I like presenting as more. And the answer to this is male. Because that's the gender that I am. Presenting as female is uncomfortable, and feels wrong.

Q: Are you attractive to your biological gender or the other way?

A: So another assumption here and guessing you are asking what gender I am attracted to. To which the answer is semi-complicated. I am technically pansexual, meaning I don't care about gender and have no hang ups dating other trans people. HOWEVER, I am almost exclusively attracted to men. I can think of maybe 2 women in my life who I have been attracted to. On the off chance that you ARE asking if I am attractive to my biological sex, I dunno, you'd have to ask them

Q: Can you be trans and gay?

A: Yes! Gender and sexuality are not the same!! Gender is how you express yourself, and sexuality is who you are attracted to. You can absolutely be trans and gay!

Q: What is it like with all of this trans issues now surfacing

A: Honestly, it's pretty scary. A lot of people have violent feelings towards trans people and that means I have to be careful all the time. It's also an interesting time to be trans, as there is now a larger push for our civil rights, and it is being covered in the media.

Q: For example, if a guy transitions to a girl, would they still a penis or would they get surgery for that as well?

A: That depends on the person! There are surgery's (referred to as bottom surgery) that can reconstruct the genitals to match the gender that you identify with if you are trans. Some trans women/men get bottom surgery, and some do not. It's all a matter of preference.

Q: For those who are post open, is the surgery long and painful and is it difficult recovering from it?

A: So I am guessing you meant, post operation. I have not had any surgery's yet, but based on my research it depends on the surgery. For top surgery, it is relatively short procedure, usually 2 hours. People report different experiences with pain, and recovery time, so really it differs from person to person.

Q: I read a psychological study on anorexia. It stated that looking in the mirror, an anorexic sees themselves and overweight when they aren't. In this study they compared it to transexuals looking in the mirror and seeing themselves as a different gender. Do you think its a psychological disorder? I'm not hating! Just trying to understand.

A: I do not believe that being trans is a psychological disorder, in the same way that being gay is not a psychological disorder. Just because it is something that differs from the mass population, doesn't mean that it is a mental illness.

Q: Why do you want to be a trans person?

A: So this question is working under the assumption that being trans was a choice that I made. I did not wake up one day and decide that I wanted to be a part of 0.3% of the population, and face constant discrimination. I didn't decide that I wanted to live in a way that puts my life expectancy at 30 years old.

Q: How's your day? :)

A: My day has been good! Thank you for asking!

Q: Is it more comfortable for a transgender woman to be call " she" or "her" or is it rude and disrespectful?

A: A transwoman would most likely use she/her pronouns, but if you have any doubts about someone's pronouns, it is always better to ask!

Q: Are you trans and are you supposed to be a boy or a girl?

A: Yes, I am trans, and I am a boy.

Q: Why don't you let God make you who HE wants you to be?

A: As a person who believes in God, I believe that I am exactly who he wants me to be. If God creates everyone exactly as he wishes them to be, then me being trans is a part of that plan.

Q: How did you know that you were trans? If born in the female body, for example, and your brain chemistry was male, did you ever feel like feminine? Also, how did you know you were transgender rather than just a 'tomboy'?

A: I knew I was trans around age 12. I guess you could say that I had times when I felt feminine, but it always felt wrong. It felt fake, like it wasn't how I was supposed to be feeling. And the thing about being trans vs. being a tomboy is that being a tomboy, you are completely okay with being female and you don't actually feel you are male. When you're trans, you are actually male.

-This post originates from my personal website, which you can find at thelettertblog.wordpress.com-


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