We have all been there, experienced our first love and the devastating heartbreak after. I was 15 when I experienced my first heartbreak and I have come a long way since, but it took me a while to realize what a blessing that heartbreak actually was.
I learned what kind of love and relationship I wanted, what I deserved, but I also learned these 15 things that have helped me learn to love others better, not just in relationships but in friendships too.
1. Relationships Take Work
Relationships are not as easy as they look. They take work and you have to communicate with your partner.
2. Love Is a Choice
Love is not a feeling but a choice with feelings. It may feel like a lot of things, anger, hurt, happiness, joy, and all the other emotions but at the end of the day, we have to make the choice each and every day to love the other person.
3. There Will Be Fights
We are not perfect people and we make mistakes and we will do things the other disagrees with but that is OK. But do not go around picking fights either.
4. Fights Should NOT Be Historical
You have to learn how to fight fairly. You cannot keep hanging all of their past mistakes over them. Leave the past in the past.
5. Forgiveness
Not just in the relationship but after. We have to forgive them for any pain they may have caused because holding on to the hurt and anger makes the pain even worse. Truly forgive them and be able to let it go once you have and leave it in the past.
6. Relationships Involve TWO people
There should only be two people involved in a relationship. You do not have to tell your friends everything, trust me it just creates unnecessary drama. But also you cannot blame everything that goes wrong on the other person. Realize that you make mistakes too and own up to those mistakes.
7. COMMUNICATION IS KEY
So many simple, irrelevant, little things can be avoided by simply communicating. Communicate with them so you all can work on fixing things together.
8. You Cannot Control the Other Person
You cannot control other people period.
9. Do Not Depend On Someone Else to Make You Happy
People are inconsistent. We mess up and make mistakes so if you are constantly relying on someone else to bring you joy and happiness you are going to constantly be disappointed.
10. If You Are Not Happy With Yourself You Cannot Expect Someone Else to Be
Do not ask someone else to love what you cannot love yourself. Learn to be OK with who you are because at the end of the day, you will ALWAYS have you.
11. You Cannot Make a Home Out Of Other Human Beings
Not all relationships last. Do not invest everything you have in one person because there is no guarantee they will stay.
12. Loving Someone Does Not Always Mean You Should Be With Them
Love and compatibility are not always the same thing.
13. Love Looks Different For Everyone
Just because someone does not love you the way you want them to, does not mean they did not love you with all they had.
14. You Outgrow Some People
You are still figuring out who you are and that is OK, but along the way some people will get left behind because they were not ready to grow with you. Some people are not meant to be in your life forever.
