They say that working in the food service industry is the most enlightening experience in a young person’s life. So, after almost two years of tireless burrito rolling at the local Chipotle Mexican Grill back in my Ohio hometown, it’s only natural that I would accumulate a bit of knowledge about our loyal customers. There is an already prevalent stereotype for fast food customers, but the ones at Chipotle are a unique breed that I hold near and dear to my heart. Here are 13 reasons why I love Chipotle customers:
1. They care deeply about their burritos.
Out of steak? No problem! Chipotle customers have no qualms about waiting 10 minutes for a fresh pan, especially if there’s a growing line of customers behind them. I mean, do you expect them to change their order just because the five people ahead of them also ordered steak? No, they’re far too passionate to let that happen.
2. They don’t take no for an answer.
If you put a glass cover between customers and their food, they will reach over it, regardless of whether or not this is acceptable. Just like if you tell them they can’t sit in an already closed-off portion of the dining area, they’ll plop down their 10 lb baskets and bowls anyway. Chipotle customers do what they want. I respect that.
3. They know the importance of staying hydrated.
Chipotle customers are always asking for water cups well after they have been rung up, even if that entails interrupting another person’s order. This is because they understand how important it is to hydrate throughout the day, and they want to share this important life lesson with others by emphatically separating it from the rest of their order.
4. They share their beautiful children with the world.
Do your children have an incessant need to destroy everything around them? Are you incapable of preventing them from fulfilling this need, even in public places? Well Chipotle is the place for you! Your kids will love smashing a burrito to bits and launching it across the room, and you won’t even get judgmental stares from other parents (as long as the kids are cute)! Oh, and don’t worry about the mess, that’s the cashier’s responsibility.
5. They appreciate our Tabasco sauces.
Our customers know that our Tabasco is so good that a few reasonable drops just won’t do. That’s why they take the whole bottle home with them instead! And again, don’t worry about replacing the bottles. That’s the cashier’s job.
6. They’re artists.
If those beautiful Pollock-esque landscapes painted in hot sauce and rice all over the bathroom sinks aren’t art, then I don’t know what is. Bravo to whoever comes in every day and shares such creativity with the world. Keep up the good work!
7. They don’t conform to norms.
So what if society says a customer should order linearly from beginning to end? If Chipotle customers want to start at the “wrong” side of the line and work in reverse, they will, and they’ll do so with confidence.
8. It’s never too late for them to visit.
Our customers know that at 9:55 on a Friday night, all we employees want to see are their shining faces one last time before we close. That’s why they bring their friends too, and sometimes they’ll even stay after the doors close to keep us company through the night. How thoughtful is that?
9. They believe in their civil rights.
No one, and I mean no one, can tell our customers that they can’t have more of something in their burritos, tacos, or bowls. They know their right to a 2,000 calorie meal, and they will exercise it.
10. They challenge us.
Chipotle customers know that during our ever slow and drawling shifts, we’re always looking for a challenge to improve our skills. That’s why they come up with orders like a dozen hard shell tacos, burritos with three scoops of every salsa, and a bowl lined with six lightly pressed tortillas. Thanks for always keeping us on our toes!
11. They’re creative.
Most customers at fast food restaurants stick with the conventional, corporate issued names for their meals. Chipotle customers, on the other hand, have all kinds of fun names for what they want in their burritos. Tell me, which order sounds more fun: fajitas, pico, sour cream, and lettuce, or veggie things, Plinko, white stuff, and salad? And don’t worry about offending Latino/a employees by butchering the Spanish language. This is America, they’re used to it.
12. They believe in themselves.
Chipotle customers know that the limited size of a tortilla is merely another way of the man telling them they can’t have what they want. Most customers would stop after four or five ingredients, once the tortilla looks full enough to constitute a regular-sized burrito. But our customers won’t let the laws of physics (or common decency) stand in the way of their dreams of having football-sized balls of carbs and happiness for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
13. And they believe in our abilities.
So much so, in fact, that when we wrap their gargantuan burritos, they don’t even thank us. Because they know this would imply that it’s difficult for us to wrap burritos and that their appreciation would hurt our swelling pride in tortilla maneuvering. Thanks for always putting our feelings first, guys. You rock!
