10 . don't neglect your mental health
The body may move, and the heart may feel, but without a healthy mind to process thoughts, it leads to a impasse. Your mental health is more important than you think. It's important to be within a health environment where you are able to process your feelings, sort out your thoughts, and seek solutions to your worries. It doesn't hurt to be vulnerable, especially if you're a guy or Asian (I am both). It doesn't matter about the cultural stigmas; if you require professional help, it doesn't hurt to ask. Whether if it is a counselor, psychiatrist, etc..
11. pull out the fucking weeds
An important person I used to talk to told me this once. At first, I understood exactly what this meant; I just didn't want to commit to it. I was afraid of the consequences this would entail if I were to cut stuff (whether it if places, things, or people) out of my life for the better. Of course, he meant well; I just didn't listen to him as I should've. But now that I know, I finally understand. Moving on from (fill in the blank) should be necessary. Being leeched off of from bad habits, terrible job conditions, uncomfortable places, people is not a good feeling. Letting go and finding time to find yourself is necessary to create a new, clean slate. It's going to be very hard to do, untying that commitment, but ultimately, you need to know what's the best for you.
12. don't wait for "nothing" to come
This is the most important lesson I've ever learned since my freshmen days. I have a serious case of FOMO. For the longest time, I waited for people, people that couldn't even give me the time of day. I kept holding on to the fact that I could just forgive and forget, to fix the relationships and always blame myself. I always apologized for nothing, over, and over, and over again. I harbored resentment only for myself, and was always trying to be "the best" that I could be in front of people. Because if they're happy with me, I'm happy too. I tried too hard to impress, too hard to fake that everything was okay, and that I was okay with it, when really I was not.
Be honest with yourself. They're not going to be at the same train station like they said they would; ride the train yourself and save all the dignity you have left for yourself. Go home and eat dinner with people who actually care about you. Go talk to people that you feel comfortable with 24/7, who appreciate you. Spend the time with people who actually want to spend time with people. Don't blame yourself for the faults of others. Don't blame yourself for trying to be the best you can be. Don't blame yourself for not being a "good friend" when you have been 112% of the time.
If you think about this, wake the fuck up. Wake up. NOW. Because if you give your all, you have nothing to yourself. You're better than that. You should know that. Put yourself first as "Player 1." You are the controller of your own, individual life; everyone else is an NPC. Every step taken forward is a step towards completion. It's your story that matters. How you decide is up to you.
