11 Things Your Friend With PTSD Needs You To Know

Some of us have had some quite unlucky and downright traumatic experiences in our lives. I know that I have, and because of these experiences, I have developed Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and have had to learn to live with this mental health condition.

Quite honestly, there have been times that I have just wanted to crawl back into bed and not deal with what the day has in store for me because I have been in such a triggered state. But, life doesn't work like that, and I have had to learn how to manage times when I get triggered and learn how to bring myself down from a seven on the Richter scale of a total PTSD meltdown. (Which, is not an easy thing to do, by the way, so I'm proud of myself for how well I've been coping with all of this.)

With that being said, if your PTSD looks anything like mine, (and, PTSD looks different for everyone who has it), here is a list of 11 things that someone with PTSD wants their friends and loved ones to know.

1. I rationally know that right now I'm OK, but, I don't feel OK.

Please understand that it's nothing you said or did that set me off into a triggered state, and I rationally know that I'm OK and that I'm safe, but right now, my brain is telling me the exact opposite.

2. Please be patient with me, I'm trying my best.

Right now, I might seem like I'm a million miles away, but I can promise you, I'm trying my best to calm myself down and get myself back to a good place.

3. I know my triggers, and I know my limits. Please don't test them.

When I tell you that something is triggering for me, please respect that and try to understand what I might be dealing with at the moment.

4. I know how to take care of myself in these moments, but if I need your help, I'll ask.

Enough said.

5. When you make a joke about "being triggered," it might sound harmless to you, but it's hurtful to me.

Please think about what you say before you say something like that.

6. Not everyone who has PTSD reacts the same way, our brains have all been traumatized differently.

Just because you hear that someone has PTSD, doesn't automatically mean this person will fly off the handle or become engulfed with rage. Different people handle trauma differently, so please don't stereotype everyone with this diagnosis.

7. I'm perfectly fine at least 80 percent of the time, but the 20 percent that I'm not still matters.

This one is specific to me and how I have been dealing with my PTSD, but honestly, whatever the ratio of "I'm fine to I'm not OK" time is for someone, it's important to remember that both of those numbers matter.

8. I would like to be given a fair opportunity in the workplace environment

Again, this is another one that is specific to me and can also be applied in general. I have applied to a job before and been honest about my PTSD diagnosis and was not given a fair opportunity at this place of employment because of that. I personally feel that everyone, regardless of mental health status, should have a right to work where they are qualified.

9. Please don't stereotype me.

Just because I've been diagnosed with PTSD doesn't make me any less capable of fulfilling a job requirement or a task than what anyone else is.

10. PTSD isn't just from combat or war-like situations.

This is a big misconception about the condition. My trauma does not stem from any kind of active-duty situation. It's important to remember that different harsh life circumstances can traumatize people in different ways.

11. Please, please, please don't ask "what happened to you?"

If someone who lives with PTSD trusts you enough and feels that they can talk to you about what they have been through, then they will tell you if, or when, they personally feel ready to. Just like you wouldn't ask someone how much money they make or what they weigh, please have that same kindness in mind and refrain from asking someone with PTSD what they have lived through. Oftentimes, that just re-traumatizes someone, and no one wants that. (That falls into the "think before you speak" category here.)

Report this Content
Swoon

119 People Reveal How The Pandemic Has Affected Their Love Lives, And Honestly... Relatable

"I haven't been able to get out of the 'talking phase' with anyone."

The reality is, there's no part of life the pandemic hasn't affected. Whether it's your work life, your home life, your social life, or your love life, coronavirus (COVID-19) is wreaking havoc on just about everything — not to mention people's health.

When it comes to romance, in particular, people are all handling things differently and there's no "right way" of making it through, regardless of your relationship status (single, taken, married, divorced, you name it). So, some of Swoon's creators sought out to hear from various individuals on how exactly their love lives have been affected since quarantine began.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

How To Binge-Watch A TV Show —And Then Write A Review About It

Writing your favorite and least favorite things about a show could not be more fun.

Photo by Mollie Sivaram on Unsplash

Looking for a new show to binge? Stop scrolling through your options and listen.

Sometimes a good show doesn't come down to the genre or the actors involved, it comes down to the fact that it is simply a GOOD show. If any of these things sound appealing to you, you should definitely watch.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

11 Reasons Why Getting A Cat Is The Best Thing You Can Do For Your Mental Health

Cats may mess up your puzzles but they'll always love you unconditionally — as long as you have some catnip, that is.

Scout Guarino

Alright, everyone, it's time to stop spreading the rumor that all cats are mean, aloof, and hate everyone. Like dogs, each cat has its own personality and tendencies. Some like a lot of attention, some like less — each person has to find the right cat for them. As for me, my cats Bienfu and Reptar have seen me at my worst, but they've also helped pull me out of it. They're a constant in my life and they give me the strength to get through the day in spite of my depression, and there's even scientific evidence to support it!

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

How To Write Down The Holy Grail Recipe Everyone Begs You To Make

Because everyone has a signature cocktail, cake, or pasta they bring to every potluck.

NBC

From back when I used to bring my mom's classic white chocolate chip cookies to preschool on my birthday to now stirring up my signature tequila cocktails at every friends' barbecue, I've always had a couple of standby recipes in my culinary rotation.

Keep Reading... Show less
Adulting

Meet My Cat: Cheshire, The Stray Turned House Cat Who Lives in Michigan

I never considered myself a cat person, but Chess immediately stole my heart.

Madelyn Darbonne

In 2016, a stray cat gave birth to a litter of three grey kittens on my aunt and uncle's property. I had never considered myself to be much of a cat person, but these furballs immediately stole my heart. I got to watch them grow up until they were old enough to leave their mother's side.

Keep Reading... Show less

Anyone who goes to Panera Bread will tell you that their mac and cheese is to die for. If you're a huge fan of their mac and cheese, you won't believe the new recipe they're coming out with!

Keep Reading... Show less

I've been bleaching my hair since I was in seventh grade. Yes, you read that correctly, seventh grade. That's nearly 10 years of maintaining a very light shade of blonde that too-often brings about dryness and brittle strands.

Keep Reading... Show less

Chances are if you're here, you're probably interested in writing an open letter. Yay! We're excited to have you.

Of course, not all open letters are created equal. In fact, there's a recipe to writing one for Odyssey that'll get featured on one of our many verticals. When it comes to Swoon specifically (for those new around here, that's our dating and relationships vertical), we receive dozens of open letters each month, many of which are all very similar.

Keep Reading... Show less

With a new phone comes great responsibility: Do not break it! And the best way to do that is with a case. However, picking a case can be a challenge. No need to fret, I am here to help break down some of the best cases for the new iPhone SE 2020. Honestly, I think it's going to be impossible to choose!

Keep Reading... Show less

To some who have been out of the dating world for a while, it can be hard to get back into the swing of things after being single for some time. So, I asked 26 people what they think is important to know before looking for love again, here's what they had to say.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments