As an independent woman, you're all right handling your own business. You've got your life together, and you're a strong, sharp woman who can handle anything by herself. But even the most self-sufficient of us want to find love, right? Unfortunately, not everyone takes to a self-reliant woman in the same way. So here are 11 things every independent woman wants her potential suitor to understand:
1. We want to talk about real things.
Small talk, aimless conversation—its all fine at first! But once we've gotten to know you, we just wanna talk about real life stuff like careers, politics, TV shows, sports, hobbies. We know the weather is nice, and being called "sexy" got old the 17th time you said it.
2. We do have other things on our schedule.
You could be Prince Charming himself, and we still might have to move that lunch date to next Friday instead of this Friday. We are busy girls ya know!
3. We want to be your partner in crime, not just arm candy.
No, we aren't exactly the type to "sit and look pretty." We can wear nice clothes and enjoy a good chick flick, but we'll also have a Nerf gun war or throw the football with you too. We're girls who can do both. *hair flip*
4. It doesn't have to be fancy, it just has to be creative.
OK, sure, every girl likes a nice dinner every once in a while, but independent ladies aren't as wooed by the glitz as your average girl. We just ask that if you take us on a date, have it be something we can enjoy together. Think about what we have in common and go from there! We don't even mind if you introduce us to something you love, just please save the stereotypical dinner and a movie for a rainy day.
5. Chivalry is important, but it can be excessive.
A man holding the door for a woman is the gentlemanly thing to do. But if we are in front, and we happen to hold the door for you instead, that's okay too. We can open doors and ask for a refill from the waiter just like any other human being. Be courteous, be chivalrous, but don't make it weird and overbearing.
6. We will tell you exactly what we want or how we feel.
We're not really the type to beat around the bush or have a hidden meaning. So if we say something you can believe it. On the same note, we will let you know if it isn't going well or we just aren't feeling it. Don't be offended—instead just try to respect the idea that you won't have to waste your time or worry about what we are actually thinking.
7. Sometimes we just may need to take it slow.
Typically guys are the ones to avoid the commitment issue, however when your personality is fiercely independent, it's hard to commit to having someone in your life 24/7. It doesn't mean we aren't open to it, but please don't start talking about marriage on the second date.
8. We really really hate the damsel in distress card.
The problem is while we may be a damsel, we are very rarely in distress. And if we are, we can probably handle it ourselves. If we need help, we will gladly ask for it (see No. 6), but please don't think that because you are a man you absolutely need to help us out of every little situation.
9. The worst thing you can possibly do is belittle our work/accomplishments/actions.
Honestly, who ever told a guy that it was flattering to call a woman's stresses or issues "cute" or "adorable?" Our job is hard. Our school work is intense. It's not "sweet" that we get so caught up in our lives. We will accept the words dedicated, impressive and strong. Please use them accordingly.
10. We don't deserve to be shamed because we know what we want.
We've heard all of the name-calling when a relationship doesn't work out. We've been the ones who got blamed because we decided that it wasn't going in a direction we wanted it to go. Sometimes things just aren't meant to be and we just want you to respect that, and we will respect you right back
11. We've done it on our own until now, so if we have to, we can do it again.
We're not afraid of being alone because we know we can handle this. Its not that we don't want another person in our lives—just like any other human, we want a person we can share our accomplishments and failures with and laugh and talk about life. However we aren't willing to lower our expectations and not be treated like we deserve
Once you get to know our kind, we independent girls are really fun to hang out with. It's easy to get caught up in the idea that we are bossy or oppressive, but that's not the case. We are just strong women who know what we want, and if you treat us right it might just turn out to be something great.
