You’ve grown up watching the movies. You’ve memorized all the songs. You’ve trained yourself not to cry when you meet Winnie the Pooh. You saved up and finally bought the tickets to the Happiest Place on Earth: Walt Disney World. While the payoff of making the most of your time at Disney makes it all worthwhile, there are some snags in the grand design that can leave you…less than chipper.
1. Having to use your own money
Fun fact: at the end of your stay, if you listen hard enough, you can hear your wallet crying. You can save and prepare your budget all you want, but you always end up spending more than you realized. It can be a little too easy to be jealous of all the kids with their parents paying for everything.
2. Transportation
Having to figure out the network of bus routes and monorails by yourself can make or break your day. You’re only 50 percent certain of where you’re going, and if you end up at a "surprise" location, basically say a prayer.
3. Not having a parent to push you in your stroller
Walking all day is terrible y’all. You will wish you were the toddler next to you cruising in her hooded polka-dot stroller.
4. It's weird when you cry
Seeing a kid overcome with emotion during "The Lion Kin"g live show is kind of endearing. Seeing a 20-year-old do it makes everyone around them question their emotional state.
5. There’s someone under that Goofy costume
There’s nothing quite like taking a picture with your childhood hero while also being VERY aware of the fact that Mickey is also probably a college intern named Chad who really needs a water break.
6. The kids are the priority, not you
Yes, I understand that the little girl dressed like you is really cute and believes you’re the real Belle, but I’ve loved you for 15 years. That should give me some experience points.
7. Parents don't appreciate your enthusiasm
Apparently, the only ones who should be over-the-moon excited for the park attractions are the children. Parents don’t seem to enjoy an adult shout-singing "Let It Go" over the children at the Frozen Sing Along.
8. You are your own survival kit
There is no parent to turn to when you forget to pack sunscreen or a rain poncho. You can’t hide a shame sunburn, they glow a little brighter than the rest.
9. The children...They're everywhere
There is nothing cuter than seeing a child’s face light up when they get to meet their favorite character or princess. There is nothing worse than being stuck in a cramped monorail with an inconsolable toddler who should’ve been in bed hours ago. Patience is very necessary.
10. There is an unmentioned dress code
You have to at least put up the illusion that you have your life together. Sure, Mickey ears and Disney merch are fine, but any time you pass by someone your age who looks like they just stepped out of a PacSun catalog, you suddenly start reevaluating every article of clothing you brought.
11. The Disney hangover
By day two or three, you will wake up feeling like you’ve been hit by a truck. Being on your feet over 12 hours a day can do that. Unfortunately, you have to be your own hype man, and get yourself out of bed and to the transport station.
Hey, It's not easy sharing the happiest place on earth with thousands of other people. There are bound to be some bumps along the way to Disney heaven. But despite the setbacks of wait times and dehydrated toddlers, it's all worth it to experience the magic that is never truly growing up.
