Confessions of a Deli Clerk
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Confessions of a Deli Clerk

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Confessions of a Deli Clerk
Feng Shui Nexus

1. Stop asking for samples of plain stuff.

We all know how ham, turkey, chicken, and american cheese tastes. Stop asking for a sample; some places aren’t supposed to. We have people who come in and do that once a week.

2. Pay attention to the numbers

If I call number 10 and you are number two but you just weren’t paying attention, you need to take a new number. It is not our fault you aren’t able to pay attention to the numbers going up or us screaming the numbers out in front of you

3. Speak Up

I have other clerks talking next to me, people screaming numbers, machines making noises, and the same horrible 80’s music playing above me. If you don’t speak up I may not get the right product or the right amount for you.

4. Don’t ask if we can change something

I constantly get bombarded with the same questions. “I don’t like Spicy flavors on chicken, can I get another kind for the same price?” or “Can I swap the combo for another kind of product?” The answer will always be no unless we are out of the item and are told to substitute it with a different product.

5. Get off the phone

If you are on your phone and are on a line where you are needed to participate in the conversation you are now the most hated kind of customer. We will speak louder than normal when you’re on the phone and constantly come back to you to double check your order just to interrupt. If you won’t give us the attention needed or hold up a finger as a silent term for “One second,” we will force you to give it to us. The call can wait the five minutes it takes to get your order done.

6. Don’t be a magician

The next kind of customer we despise is the customer who doesn’t stay put but thinks “Oh I need milk let me go to the other side of the store quick.” Due to this we stand puzzled for a second, call out what the product we got for you was and when you aren’t there we leave it for you and continue with the line and when you come back and say you weren’t done we can’t help you because you disappeared and didn’t leave a list or say anything before hand.

7. Don’t talk down to us

Just because I am a college student behind a counter serving you does not mean you are better than I am. It just means I am a college student trying to save money for when I go back to school with a part time job. Treat us how you want to be treated is all we ask and in return you will get your products taken care of quickly and properly.

8. Don’t be the last person standing

If you know that the store closes at nine o’clock do not come in at 8:50 requiring a list of items that will keep us busy until nine. We still have to finish cleaning up and we have been standing there for 10 hours. We want to go home--be kind if you’re getting something from an order counter come earlier.

9. Do not ask us where stuff is

I work behind the counter, I do not roam this store and learn where we keep that specific cake mix that you have to find. It is not my job. If you have a question where something is either go to customer service, ask someone on the floor, or actually use the signs above the isles that tell you what is in each of the isles.

10. Everything is not as it seems

The case is like a two way mirror. You see a neat display of all the products lined up, I see a fridge stuffed with all the products in no particular order. So when you say it is right there and to use it, I can’t. That is the display so keep your fingers off of it, we have to clean the prints off the case later and it becomes a pain when there is customers standing all around it.

11. We aren’t a subway.


When you come in and ask for a sandwich we don’t mind. All we ask is that you do not get mad if we take a little longer with it. If you are looking for a cheap sandwich go to a subway, they do it in two minutes. We have to find the products, slice them, and then put it all together. And when we don’t have the red peppers or the special kind of sauce you want, don’t give us a look and complain. We have the basics. We are not Subway.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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