The title says it all: Burritos are better than boys. Whether it's from Chipotle, Taco Bell or your favorite local mexican restaurant, men have nothing on a good bean burrito. Aside from where you get your burrito; you can eat it at a restaurant, or you can order a burrito straight to your door, when was the last time having a boyfriend was that convenient? So next time you want to snuggle up to something, try snuggling up to a burrito instead of someone who will rip your heart out first change they get and here's eleven other reasons you should try picking up a burrito instead of picking up a boy:
1. Burritos don't bathe themselves in Axe body spray.
I'm not trying to suffocate every time I'm within 10 feet of a man, a burrito would never do this to me.
2. Burritos don't brag about how often they go to the gym.
The daily Snapchat gym selfie is just a lot, okay?
3. Burritos never lie to you.
A burrito would never tell you that he didn't text that girl when you know very well that he did, in fact, text that girl.
4. Burritos never leave you alone at the bar.
You turn around and your man is no longer there, now you have to walk home alone. This situation is all too familiar, but not if you had a burrito.
5. Burritos don't need you to stroke their ego.
You don't need to dumb yourself down around a burrito, they accept you as you are, even if you are smarter than them.
6. Burritos never try to hit on your best friend.
Becky? Tiffany? Now your best friend? Your man hitting on other girls is almost an inevitability in the "millennial" age, but not if you put your faith in a burrito.
7. Burritos would never lead you on.
A burrito when never lead you to believe you were a couple when you really weren't, a burrito is more mature and upfront than that.
8. Burritos never leave you on read.
If a burrito could text, it would text you back fast. It would never leave you on after you asked an important (or not so important) question.
9. Burritos won't make you self-conscious.
A burrito would never make you feel conscious about your legs when you are wearing a dress, a burrito would just want you to be happy and comfortable.
10. Burritos never interrupt you when you're talking.
A burrito lets you complete your thought before it offers up it's own opinions about your life, and a burrito would never "mansplain" things to you.
11. Burritos are always emotionally available.
A burrito would never emotionally lead you on, only to find that they are, in fact, emotionally unavailable. A burrito is always there for you, no matter what, just remember that.
