Here are 11 reasons why we shouldn’t have class the week after snowpocalypse 2016:
The university is like...
1. There is 'sNOway' am I trudging through all of the 13-inch plus snow piles to run across campus in 15 minutes.
2. All the sludge that melts from the ice is going to ruin my shoes.
3. The snow is so bright I might go blind.
4. The buses may slide and kill me on the sidewalk.
Free tuition.
5. The snowplows will be the end of me.
6. I won’t be able to focus in class because I will be so concerned about my journey to the next building across the white abyss.
7. I don’t feel like doing the stanky-leg in front of everyone on the patches of ice.
8. If DangerousRide can’t take me to the library tonight, I can’t do my homework, therefore, I should save your time and not come to class.
9. My Fitbit might get too cold in the snow.
The steps won't even count....
10. My body cannot handle the cold...AKA I'll just sleep in class.
...me.11. Just no.































