Long distance relationships suck, but they can also be well worth it. Yeah, they may be more work than other relationships but they can be just as great. I am currently in a long distance relationship with a guy I met while in college. We haven’t been together long, but early on in our relationship we realized what could help make this long distance easier.
1. Trust each other
Relationships aren’t easy and without trust it makes it that much harder especially in a long distance relationship. Neither one of you wants to be the one constantly texting and calling when you’re significant other is out or spending time with other people that you may not have even met yet. So trust is important and you have to make sure you have that to survive the time apart.
2. Set goals
This is another important one in my opinion. Is this long term? Is it just an experiment? Is there a future in this? How long will this be long distant and are we okay with that? Whatever the case may be, you and your partner must establish some goals and lay down some expectations. In doing so, you both now have a set plan and can try and pursue it together as a team.
3. Find time for each other
When you two are apart, it can be hard to remember that you need to continue to make time for them. Phone calls, video calls, playing games together, etc… Whatever it may be, take time out of your day/week to have some quality time together. Make sure you are showing them that they are still an important part of your life even though they may not be physically there at the moment.
4. Keep each other updated
When you do have that quality time together, have meaningful conversations but also talk about the simple things. Talk like a couple who sees each other every day does. Talk about your day, your job, and all the simple things we sometimes forget to mention in a long distance relationship. It doesn’t always have to be a well thought out conversation to know the person still cares. Sometimes something as simple as how was your day can spark the best conversation and it keeps you guys updated on each other’s lives just like any other couple would be.
5. Work around each other’s schedules
You don’t want to be blowing up their phone if they’re out to eat with their family or at an important interview, so talk about these things. Let them know when you’ll need them to not text you for a bit, but also let them know how it went afterwards. Little things like that are perfect ways to treat your relationship like any other and it helps both of you maintain your lives while you guys are apart. That being said...
6. Cherish the time you have apart
Use this time to hang out with your family and friends or use it to do something you love. Sometimes the time apart can be a good thing and a time to experience being on your own (without actually being alone) and you can realize the things you like and the things you’re willing to compromise with your partner.
7. Cherish the time you have together
When you do get to spend time together, cherish it! Do something adventurous, go out to eat, or just be lazy all day, but spend some quality time together. Talk about things you don’t want to discuss over a phone call. Stay up late, get lost in deep conversation, and cherish it with everything you have. It won’t be long before you’re saying goodbye again so enjoy the time you do get together.
8. Communicate effectively
Communication seems to be getting brought up a lot (hint: It’s important), but seriously, besides talking about each other’s days and schedules prepare for the hard stuff. You will disagree and not knowing how to communicate effectively will put the relationship at such a greater risk to fail. Talk things out! This would be one of those times where a phone call (not a text) is necessary and where listening and understanding each other should play an important role. You two are already distant, there’s no need to make the distance worst so communicate.
9. Stay positive about the relationship
There will be people who doubt your relationship. Ignore them! If you two have a plan to make it work and it’s actually working, then prove those people wrong and show them you guys are stronger than that and...
10. Accept the fact that long distance is difficult
There will be plenty of obstacles thrown your way and plenty of doubt and second guessing, but if you two are willing to make it work then you should be okay.
