So one day my friend, Jennifer, and I were discussing how we might act as parents one day. Quickly we discovered there we both had some quirks that are not ideal for the modern caretaker. Jen and I sat down and wrote some of the many ways the two of us might mess up our families one day.

1. Jennifer: "Sometimes I have no filter."

I am a very open and blunt person, and I am likely going to tell my kids anything and everything they never needed/wanted to know.

2. Thomas: "Occasionally I’ll go on all night Netflix binges."

Everyone with Netflix has done this at some point. Heck, me and my mom do this sometimes, but my problem is I won’t wait for my child to be in their late high school years, instead my toddler and I will be watching full seasons of "Parks and Rec" until the sun comes up.

3. Jennifer: "I pretty much have the energy of a sloth."

Do you ever have one of those days where you wake up and just go, “Nope.” Well that's me every other day. My kids will yell at me to make breakfast and take them to school and I will just give them a sleepy grumble that suggest, “Do it your own dang self.”

4. Thomas: "I will treat my kids like bros."

I swear the first thing I’m gonna do if I hear I have a sun is give him his first fist-bump. Whats worse is all throughout his childhood I’ll embarrass him in front of his friends by cramping his style in every possible way.

5. Jennifer: "I have a ridiculous sweet tooth problem."

I have always loved sweets and everything to do with sugar. My kids are either going to end up surviving on PopTarts and Chocolate Milk or deprived of all things sweet because I have eaten them all.

6. Thomas: "I can’t take crying seriously."

I can just see it now, my son is riding his bike without training wheels for the first time! He’s doing well up until he clotheslines himself on the neighbor's mailbox. He staggers to his feet and begins to bawl his eyes over his scraped knee, he looks to me with tears in his eyes looking for encouragement. I see his pain so I respond with the five most encouraging words I know: “Suck it up you wuss

!”

7. Jennifer: "I am hardcore overbearing."

I want to be involved in all my friends’ lives in one way or another, so I assume it will be the same with my kids. But I'll want to be a part of everything.

8. Thomas: "I’m already practicing for ‘dad jokes.'"

Seriously though if I’m ever lucky enough to be a father, I’m gonna probably do a lot of things wrong, but one thing I will nail is cheesy puns. I’ve studied for years and tutored with the absolute worst of the worst when it comes to irritating jokes, and when the time comes, I’ll be ready with the quickest “Hey is for horses!” and “Hi tired! I’m dad!” jokes you’ve ever seen.

9. Jennifer: "I am way too competitive."

Even though I don't like to compete 24/7, I will be competitive until the day I die. Fair warning kids, but I'm not sure I'll be able to let you win Uno on Family Game Night. That goes for you too, hubby.

10. Thomas: "There’s a good chance I’ll never allow my kids on social media."

Look this is actually probably what will make me the best dad. I mean seriously, I’m probably doing the world a favor by keeping at least one more awkward preteen off Facebook, and in the long run my kids will see I’m doing them a favor as well. If you don’t believe me just look through a middle schooler's Facebook, or even worse, look through your own, you’ll immediately see why I’ve chosen to keep my kids off, at least until their older.