We all have said it, "What will it take to get Syracuse to cancel classes?"
I’ve said it many times and every time I am disappointed because Syracuse University has only ever cancelled classes once in the last five years and it was only for a half day. So Syracuse, I have done you a favor, here are the top 10 times you should cancel class.
1. When it’s below zero degrees Fahrenheit.
Let’s be real about this one. Nobody wants to go outside. You have to wear 50 layers of clothes to walk to class and then once you finally get there you are so hot that you need to shed all of those clothes. You are distracted because all you want to do is sit in bed or stay in one place because the thought of putting on all those layers again is horrible.
2. When the Health Center sends out emails that humans shouldn’t be outside for longer than 15 minutes because frostbite.
This one is common sense. The majority of the students on this campus will have to walk to somewhere that is further than 15 minutes away. Whether it be class, a meeting, someone’s dorm / house – 15 minutes will be spent outside. Therefore, classes should be cancelled because I am not about to get frostbite to got to a 500-person lecture.
3. When the roads are icier than a hockey rink.
This is less about student safety and more about faulty. Faculty members live far away from campus and they drive to campus. If the Syracuse school districts have cancelled their school day, chances are the roads aren’t safe for people to be driving on. This should mean that faculty for the University shouldn’t be on the roads – it is dangerous.
4. When the Quad was flooded from a mixture of rain, snow, slush and ice.
We all know the day I am talking about. It was around 40 degrees and we had just gotten over the weekend of negative temperatures. The snow was melting because it was warm and because it was raining, the rain was making giant puddles all over campus and then
5. When there was four feet of snow dumped on Syracuse in 12 hours.
You know what? Snow sucks – there I said it. And you know what sucks more than snow? four feet of it appearing literally out of nowhere overnight and having to trudge through it to get to class. Here’s the deal, Syracuse does their best to plow for us and generally they do a great job, but when four feet of snow is dumped on us in less than 12 hours, the amazing people that come out to plow us out of our dorms, apartments, etc. can’t do it all.
6. When Oprah, Joe Biden or anybody really famous / powerful comes.
Good old Uncle Joe and Aunt Oprah came one day (different days, but still). The campus went into mayhem when they both showed up. Lines out of Schine, insane amounts of security and limos and even more insane amounts of students skipping class in hopes of catching a glimpse. So next time you bring someone famous / powerful to speak to us, just cancel class.
7. The day after Juice Jam and the day after the Super Bowl.
Simple reason: we were out late the night before and we are still recovering, how about some help?
8. When the AirOrangeX isn’t working.
AirOrangeX fails on us all the time. Got a paper due at 11 a.m. – you can bet AirOrangeX is down. What about trying to upload homework to Blackboard? Yep, the Wi-Fi is down again. Every time AirOrangeX isn’t working teachers complain, students complain and life just gets hard. Cancel class make life not hard.
9. Mayfest.
This one is obvious. If students do have class, they are 100 percent not drinking water in that water bottle. If you are going to provide your students with free food and concerts on a Friday, then cancel class, please.
10. Any day when it is above 70 degrees and sunny out.
A 70-degree day in CUSE is Christmas – you don’t have class on Christmas so why have class on a 70-degree day? Let us enjoy the rarity that is a nice, sunny day in CUSE. You can enjoy it too, only if you cancel class.
