We have survived. The decorations are coming down and thank goodness the ooey-gooey, lovey-dovey, sticky-wicky time of year is over. Love has left the air, and we can now officially return to our cynical lives. Ok, even if you don't hate Valentines Day you can at least say you are glad the pressure is off. The gifts have been exchanged, and now we can all breathe a little easier. So as a tribute to those of you who love to hate or hate to love Valentines day, here are 10 things that you definitely saw on this Valentine's Day
1. A GIANT BEAR
You inevitably saw some poor girl walking around campus with a teddy bear that was twice her size and probably cost more than the shoes she actually wanted for Valentines Day. You probably pitied her as it impeded her ability to walk. You also knew deep down that she would spend the next 3 months trying to figure out where to put the dern thing until the faithful day that the relationship ended and the monstrosity of fluff was donated to the goodwill.
2. ALL THE SNOGGING
Kissing everywhere. It was a kissing epidemic. You probably felt like you were the only person in the world not kissing someone at that very moment. You were happy for them, sure, but the urge to yell "Get a room" at the entire world was just too much for you to handle.
3. AWKWARD FIRST DATES
We all know those people who just HAVE to go on a date on Valentines Day. Valentines Day is NOT a good day for a first date, but I know you saw at least one of those dates where everyone around the first daters are madly in love and they are casually (and awkwardly) chatting about the consistency of the bread sticks at Olive Garden. Yeah. Maybe there will be a second date, but I wouldn't count on it.....
4. EXCESSIVE DRINKING
Those of us who don't have Valentines sweethearts usually try to forget about the day all together, but some people would rather get plastered and recount every foregone relationship they've ever had...to an entire bar full of people. EMBARRASSING. I'm sure you saw at least one of these Valentine's gems while out and about on that special day.
5. LIFELONG COMMITMENTS
It probably felt like everyone you have ever known got engaged. Your Facebook blew up with ring pictures, status updates, and the millions of comments about how "happy" you are about the prospect of some of your closest friends selling their soul to the marriage demons.
6. THE OLD BLUE HAIRS
Hopefully you saw at least one pair of older people expressing their love. That could warm even the coldest of Valentine's hearts. Old people are precious. Especially when they are out on dates together.
7. A BREAK UP
On Valentines Day you probably saw at least one break up. Someone "forgot" it was Valentines day or someone got a truly awful present (like a vacuum cleaner). And consequently someone got their dumb self dumped. Yes, it's really awful to break up with someone on Valentines Day, but hey... some people obviously deserve it
8. SINGLE WOMEN
We all know those girls that celebrate Anti-Valentines Day, and you probably saw a herd of them. They go out with their other single friends and have a drink to celebrate their independence from the life of oppression under a man. Usually this just turns into a he-woman man haters club meeting (like the little rascals, but the opposite) and includes grinding on the closest single man just to prove that "I don't miss my ex and I don't need no man." Oh yeah. You go girl. You show 'em.
9. THE WALK OF SHAME
Do I have to say much more about this one? On Valentines Day the walk of shame can happen at ANY time of the day. It can strike at ANY moment. We all know you saw these chicks stumbling home in their fancy clothes and probably looking like they had been through a tornado, and admit it, you laughed a little. We all did.
10. REAL PEOPLE
Through all the crazy Valentine's Day stereotypes I can guarantee you saw a few couples, if not a lot of couples, that truly love one another. You saw that guy who always opens doors for his girl even when it isn't a holiday. You saw the husband and wife rushing through dinner just to get back to their toddler because they are new parents and this is the first time he's been with a sitter. You saw the step father taking his step daughter to her first Valentines Day dance, and you saw the couple that has been married 50 years and still look at each other as though they are newly weds. Maybe just maybe you were one of these people, and if not I hope you one day will be.
True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
-Erich Segal
