Being in a relationship is hard. Being in a long-distance relationship is even harder. But what about being in a long-distance military relationship? Any girl in a long-distance relationship knows the daily struggles of missing your boyfriend or waiting for that FaceTime at weird hours of the day, but not every girl knows the true struggles of a long-distance military relationship. Well I've been a "military girlfriend" for a little over two years now and here's what I've learned:
1. FaceTime is your best friend
As annoying as it can be, FaceTime truly does become your best friend. Even though you'll go through the majority of your conversations with that annoying "poor connection" message on the screen, nothing compares to getting to see their face after a long day-even if it's just for a few minutes.
2. You won't be taken as seriously by other military couples
Chances are, unless there's a ring on your finger many people don't take your relationship very seriously. For some reason no matter how long you've dated your military guy if you carry the label of "girlfriend" people just have the notion that your relationship is temporary.
3. You make plans and the military laughs
This one has been extremely frustrating for me. No matter how far in advance you may try to plan a trip to see your boyfriend something always comes up. Whether it's a few lost hours because their unit needs to work late or it's a few days taken from your time together for a last minute training exercise- always expect the unexpected with the military.
4. It is what it is
You begin to realize that you don't have much control in your relationship and neither does your boyfriend. You'll find yourself repeating "it is what it is" over and over again in your head to try and make sense of things.
5. You get extremely defensive when people bash the military
That moment when you hear the obnoxious kid in the corner rambling about how "people only join the military for free education and travel" or the overbearing girl in your politics class claim "the military is at fault for this country's foreign policy issues" will literally make your blood boil.
6. You become a little bitter
You start to notice other couples everywhere and roll your eyes. You notice the girlfriend yelling at her boyfriend over the most insignificant thing and you can't help but feel annoyed. You begin to realize how many couples take their time together for granted and it becomes extremely irritating but you just keep reminding yourself that for them it's customary.
7. You know the airport a lot better than you should
From the rare trips that run smoothly with your flights departing and arriving just on time, to the long days spent in an airport terminal fighting with the American Airlines sale associate to get you on that next possible flight to Virginia or wherever else, you somehow seem to know your way through the airport better than the average girl.
8. Most people don't understand
People who aren't familiar with military life don't understand how or why you do the things you do. Why would you choose to date someone who is living 500+ miles away? They don't understand what it's like to spend birthdays or Valentine's days apart from their boyfriends. They don't understand what it's like to go days without talking to and weeks or months without seeing their boyfriends. When people find out your boyfriend is in the military the common response probably is "I don't know how you do it. I couldn't" Well here's the thing.. we don't want to do it. We'd rather our boyfriends be here with us but that's not the case. The distance is temporary so for now, we make the best of things.
9. The good-byes don't get any easier
Whether you'll see him again in a week or in 6 months for some reason every good bye seems to hurt the same. You'd think that after two years of this that I'd be used to it but I don't think I ever will be.
10. You know what it feels like to really miss someone
There's going to be nights you sit in bed binge watching One Tree Hill or The Notebook and just cry but that's OK. Although it hurts like hell to be away from your best friend, you know what it feels like to truly miss someone and for that you consider yourself lucky. There will be highs and lows, but you wouldn't trade any of it for the world.
