Ah, Thanksgiving. A joyous time of year where we give thanks for everything that we've been blessed with in this life. It's also a nice little break from school and work before we dive face first into Christmas season plus hell on earth -- finals week. So in honor of this glorious weekend of chilling the f*ck out, here's some things that you might want to prepare yourself for:
1. Running into everyone you don't want to see from high school.
Whether it be at the gas station, the gym or the restaurant up the street, there is no avoiding that awkward 8 minute “how have you been? what are you up to?” conversation.
2. To eat and drink way too much.
You are probably going to be filled to the brim with home cooking and seasonal IPAs. I am willing to bet money that your pants will be unzipped at some point.
3. Your plans to be all over the place.
If you’re one of those people who are just dying to see all of your friends who are home for the weekend, be prepared to drive your a** back and forth from friend group to friend group.
4. To spend all of your money.
Whether it’s on food, booze, shopping or other fun stuff that you’ll need to enjoy your break, chances are you’re probably going to find an empty wallet when you wake up hungover at the end of the weekend.
5. To be asked too many questions.
Who’s your new boyfriend? What does he do? When are you guys having kids? Why do your jeans have holes in them? What were you thinking when you put that lipstick on this morning? Why are you crying? and the absolute worst - What’s your major?
6. Everything to become slowly engulfed by Christmas.
If you want a coffee from Starbucks, milk from the supermarket or new jeans from the mall, be prepared to be bombarded with Christmas decorations, holiday cheer and the friendly reminder that you don’t have money to buy presents for your family.
7. To ignore all of the homework that you brought home.
It was a really nice effort to bring your books with you, but let’s be honest-- those suckers are not moving until Sunday night.
8. To either sleep a lot or sleep a lot less.
This could go two ways-- you’ll either sleep until one in the afternoon or stay up until five in the morning... maybe even both.
9. To get stuck in traffic.
If you’re unlucky like me and live near a mall, or you just live anywhere remotely close to any store that sells things, be prepared to sit in a mob of angry, cheerless holiday shoppers. And if you're going out on Black Friday-- good luck out there.
10. A nice visit to your crowded local bar.
Everyone knows it’s not Thanksgiving break unless you go to an unappealing, overly packed local bar. You know, the one crawling with your high school classmates and ex-boyfriends.