I know that this isn’t the most exciting time; in fact, it’s probably a really awful time in anyone's life. It’s hard to move on from a relationship. Sometimes, it feels like you can never find out a way of that hole the breakup created. There’s some simple things you can do for yourself to help ease the healing process through every stage.

1. Don't check social media

This is a common mistake that I’ve repeated a few times in my history of breakups. Social media always feels like a comforting distraction for any emotion you're experiencing. However, I learned the hard way that this is not the case during this time. You’ll be bombarded with pictures of #relationshipgoals and couples celebrating anniversaries and you can take it from me that those posts do not give you the warm fuzzies.

2. Surround yourself with friends

Friends are the best support system. Even if there are problems in a friendship, I always see that friends can step it up and be there for you. Make sure you tell them what you need from them whether it be a distraction, advice or just someone to listen to you complain. Friends will always be there to do all of the above. This is also a great time for you and your friends to become closer. Having them help you through a hard time is a great way to build a friendship and have great memories.

3. Try new things

This is your time to try new things. Thinking of joining that new gym? Do it. Thinking of volunteering at the animal shelter? Do it. Anything is possible and sometimes it takes a breakup to see that you can do anything you want to do and that nothing is stopping you. This is the time in your life to build new memories for yourself and meet new people. It’s important to put yourself on the line to show just how strong you are and how you can always find yourself in a hard time. When I went through a recent breakup, I started going to church. Finding my faith again and sharing it with others was a very strong coping mechanism for me during a hard time.

4. Give back to your community

This one is the one that helps me through a breakup the most. Giving back to people is one of the best feelings you can have; it makes you happy and it makes someone else happy. In the process of giving back, it helps you think about how you are a good person even if you have made mistakes in the past. You can always help out at your local church, animal shelter, or by donating toys to an underprivileged daycare. Making a difference is important and if you give back, you can find other people making a difference for you because of your kind heart.

5. Let your emotions out

The most important thing to note is that it’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be angry, sad, happy or whatever feeling you have. Make sure you let your emotions out in a healthy way. Crying is a very helpful way to let emotions out. A lot of people think it makes you weak but it really doesn't. After a good cry you’ll find yourself feeling better.

6. Change your surroundings

This can honestly be anything from changing your room space around to getting out more. For me, I decided to go to the beach more. Changing my surroundings by just going to the beach helped me reflect on my life more and reflect on what people meant to me. It also helps to empower a change in your life.

7. Don’t blame yourself (distractions)

I know it’s easier said than done and sometimes you’ll find that you're blaming yourself and overthinking many details about the relationship. The more distractions that you have, the less time you will have to blame yourself. Hang out with friends and family, read a book, watch Netflix or go for a run. Any activity can help distract you from negative thoughts. It’s also important to remember that even though you blame yourself, you did nothing wrong. Things in life happen and people make mistakes and that's okay.

8. It’s okay to have unanswered questions

Does he still want me? Who was that post actually about? Was it because of his birthday? These kinds of questions tend to linger in your head after a breakup and all you want are answers. However, it’s okay not to get an answer sometimes. You don’t always need to know all the information. Sometimes what happened simply happened and that’s all that’s matters. Try not to let those things take over your life because those questions don’t define your past relationship or your worth.

9. Write a letter

Write a letter to your ex and say everything you ever wanted to say, but just never send it. After writing it you can either burn it or throw it into the wind. This really helps symbolize letting go and moving on while also helping get every single emotion out.

10. The most important one... Know that feelings are just feelings

I’ve always had trouble with dealing with my own emotions and feeling like they define me. Being sad doesn’t make me a sad person. Feeling guilty doesn’t make me a selfish person. It’s important to know that you are not defined by the changing of your own feelings. You are defined by the kindness of your heart and not by the anger, sadness or jealousy you feel from a breakup.

Even though breakups are tough, this is a new time to rebuild yourself and find out what you love. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being single. Sometimes breakups aren’t the end either and you can find yourself back together again. Enjoy your time chasing boys or girls and hanging out with your friends. Love yourself first before trying to fall in love again. It is possible to get through a breakup and you will come out stronger.