Nannying is one of those jobs that walks the fine line of parenting and insanity. Even as someone who works as a nanny, I'm still confused as to why anyone would voluntarily become a surrogate parent to children that they have no forced attachment too.
Here are some of the things that nannies everywhere understand just a little too well.
1) Realizing you actually have no power to discipline
You must somehow trick children into thinking that you do hold the power, but deep deep down you know that when worst comes to worst you truly have zero power.
2) Cartoon theme songs don't end when the TV show ends
Not only will the kids continue to sing them but after watching them over and over you start to hear it playing in the background in everyday life.
3) Any bodily function makes you question every life choice that got you to this point
What have you possibly done to deserve this.
4) Everything causes meltdowns
Happiness, sadness, anything in between could start the water works and screaming. If I have learned anything, it is that there are entirely new levels to patience when it comes to dealing with children.
5) Your diet suddenly involved a lot of strangely shaped mac and cheese.
It is just so much easier to eat whatever the kids are eating. On another note, why is children's food always shaped like cartoon characters? Is there an unwritten rule somewhere?
6) The dishes never end
Why does every single beverage need to be in a separate glass? Does every child that comes to play from the neighborhood need to have water? They really need to invest in those plates with dividers for the food so that you can put each food on the same plate without them touching.
7) The neighborhood kids are both a blessing and a curse
We love them because they entertain the kids for hours on end. We hate them because they are the culprits behind indoor water slides, mud fights, and eating all of the food in sight.
8) Anything can be used as finger paint
Anything and everything will be used as finger paint and no it doesn't always come off. However from this experience you now know 66 different ways to remove almost any substance from anywhere.
9) Silently judging the way the parents are raising the children
You now feel like the expert on raising children because you have had to work with parents with whom you both agree and disagree with. My personal favorite are the parents who only let their children watch 20 minutes of television a day. I'm sorry, but my sanity is also as important as their constructive activities.
10) You are very proud deep deep down that they manage survive every day.
Through all of the ups and downs, you manage to make it through each and everyday with the kids mostly intact and without major injuries. It gives you a little hope that in the future you might be able to raise your own children somewhat successfully.
