I've been a waitress for a couple of months, and I genuinely enjoy my time at the restaurant. I love my coworkers and I'd say 90 percent of the customers I have are fun and easy. But there are some customers who come in and just mess everything up. Here's a couple things that every server will understand.
1. Being obligated to laugh at the customers horrible jokes.
"Ha, ha, you're so funny, sir!" (I am only laughing because if I don't, then you won't tip me*.)
2. Customers who think they're the only customer in the restaurant.
Oh, no, I'm not busy even though the restaurant is completely full! How can I help you and only you?
3. Kind of wanting it to be busy, but also wanting it to be slow.
Wanting it to be busy enough for you to make money, but also wanting it to be slow enough for you to not have to do a ton of work. The struggle is real.
4. When a regular comes in and you know you're about to get a really good tip.
Not only are regulars awesome because they tip great, but seeing and having a nice conversation with a familiar face always brightens up your night.
5. "Hello, my name is..."
"Diet Coke."
If you could please let me politely introduce myself and ask you what you would like to drink, that'd be great. Don't be rude and interrupt me.
6. You can never have too many pens.
Because you know no matter how many pens you start your shift with, you'll end it with at least 10 less than what you started with.
7. You never understood how messy kids can be until they came into the restaurant.
It's really cute when kids talk to you politely, and say please and thank you. But all that cuteness goes away when they start throwing pasta across the dining room.
8. So many people in this world lack the ability to read a simple menu.
(Customer sitting in front of a two-page detailed list of every beer we have.) "Hi what kind of beers do you have?"
9. When people come in 10 minutes before closing and stay for at least an hour.
If you are a person who does this, I hate you. Please stop now.
10. You have a special hatred for people who don't tip.
Moment of silence for whoever was serving these people. I feel so bad for you. Do not come into a restaurant if you can't afford to tip. Remember that we servers do not make your food. As servers, we really do want you all to have a good experience at the restaurant, but we're humans too, nobody's perfect. There's two special places for all you non-tippers and it's called Hell and the drive-thru.
































