10 Things I Am Other Than A Functioning Adult | The Odyssey Online
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10 Things I Am Other Than A Functioning Adult

I'm not really applying my degree in the way that I should.

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10 Things I Am Other Than A Functioning Adult

1. My 2011 MacBook Pro

I was super sleek back in the day, but now I am an evil old cat that needs to be fireman carried everywhere.

2. A Slice of Pie


Super sweet, but definitely appeal more to the taste of the 50+ crowd than millennials.

3. A Mountain of Burning Money

Unemployment, student debt, and New York City can't keep pace with comedy classes and $5 cold brews.

4. A Poorly Constructed Ikea Bed


Really the fact that my bed's final ingredient was duct-tape was the nail in my adulthood coffin.

5. 99 Cent Pizza


You are what you eat.

6. 2 Buck Chuck


You are what you drink.

7. That kid at the beach who is really stoked about his new boogie board but it starts storming as soon as he hits the water.

Aren't we all this kid when it really comes down to it?

8. 2 in 1 Shampoo and Conditioner


Economical and a timesaver

9. A water cup from Chipotle crushed beneath the subway


Even Chipotle can't save you from the sweltering heat of the MTA.

10. Kenneth the Page


Because I'm still optimistic as hell.
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