My dog Gus is the light of my life. He is fluffy and fat and cute and there is nothing I love more in this world. Gustav, Gustavo, Yung Stav, Gustavius Maximus, GusBus, Gussy, GusGus, you are my sweet angel, and in honor of National Pet Day, which was this past Monday (if you didn't realize why your Instagram feed was overflowing with animals), I would like to celebrate the best way I know how: with "The Lord of the Rings." I love you, Chunk, and for all you dog freaks out there, here are 10 signs you are obsessed with love your dog, as told by "The Lord of the Rings."
1. Your dog is your Precious.
Ok, everyone saw this one coming. But seriously, my dog is #1 and I will love and cherish you forever. Glad you aren't corrupting me and turning me into Gollum, although you have sort of taken over my life.
2. Leaving your dog is the WORST.
Every time I leave Gus it's like my heart is breaking, even when I'm coming back in twenty minutes. He just looks so sad and confused! Leaving your best friend behind sucks, and it never gets easier.
3. But coming home to your dog is the best.
OMG, the greeting. It's like I've been gone for ten years or something! The jumping and tail wagging never fails to make me feel like the happiest most loved person in the world, and all I did was walk through the door.
4. When your dog starts whining or barking and you pretend you can't hear.
I literally just sat down. This is a joke. You also went outside five minutes ago like nothing in the yard has changed, I promise. Either that or your whining is making me feel so guilty I want to cry, please stop before I burst into tears and give you seventeen treats you don't need.
5. Playing with your dog is the happiest time ever.
Tug of war, fetch (if your dog actually brings something back to you and drops it. Mine does not), belly rubs... all good things. Just seeing how happy it all makes my dog makes me happy. It's the simple things in life.
6. A lot of the time it's a rally to take your dog for a walk.
In his old(er) age, Gus has become increasingly entitled, and this means he demands daily walks by starting to whine around 3:30 p.m. On a nice summer day, there is nothing I would love to do more. When it is dark, snowy, and the temperature is approaching zero? Not so much. But you know what, he needs it, so I'll suck it up. Or ask someone in my family to do it.
7. It's a red flag when other people don't like dogs.
Wait, what? This is insane. What is wrong with you? You need to reassess your life and sort out your priorities. Dogs bring so much joy and love to the world, and puppy videos for your entertainment, how can you not love them? If you don't like dogs, I'm not sure I can like you.
8. You sometimes have to clean up the accidents.
I seriously think that when we leave Gus home alone for too long, he does these things to punish us. You are house trained, I know you can do better than this. But seeing as dogs are animals, sometimes accidents happen (always be ready with stain remover, people), and you get stuck cleaning them up. Please watch your step.
9. You force your dog to snuggle with you.
And where do you think you're going? I brought you up on this couch for a reason, so sit tight and let me cuddle with you. Not sure if this GIF really works for this but on principle it had to be somewhere in this article, so here we are.
10. And finally, you want to spend every second possible with your best friend.
You are my favorite person in the world. You never judge me, even when I stay in on Saturday nights binging hardcore on Netflix and eating the entire pantry, or when I wear the same sweatsuit for three days in a row, or when I make weird names for you and talk to you as if you completely understand me because I know you secretly do. I wish you could go everywhere with me always, but you're still my best homie even though you can't.
This GIF also just really needed to make it on here because it's maybe one if the best lines in the entire film trilogy. Fun fact, my little brother got me a shirt with this entire quote on it for Christmas two years ago.