You are on Facebook stalking away and ding you get a notification, excitement runs through your body as you check what it might be. You look and oh no, it’s another event invite that reads, “EMILY’S 21ST BDAY DINNER!!” Ugh, not another birthday dinner. She is already having a birthday pregame, and lunch, AND breakfast!! Celebrating a birthday is really only fun for the birthday girl...for everyone else, it is a waste of time and money.
1. You don’t really even know the birthday girl. When you first saw the invite, you were kind of confused and kind of honored you were invited. You aren’t that close with the birthday girl, but you feel obligated to go because you got an invite.
2. You have to dress up to eat. Why is it necessary to straighten my hair, put on make up, and wear my cutest outfit to eat a pasta dish for two all by myself? Can't I just wear leggings?
3. 1 hour wait. What do you mean there is an hour wait? We made reservations two weeks ago and got here 15 minutes early. I’m hungry and this is ridiculous.
4. 3 hour dinner. Everyone knows birthday dinners are longer than regular dinners, why you ask? Probably because you have to wait for 20 plus people to order then wait for all that food to be made. On top of that at least one person’s order ALWAYS goes wrong.
5. You are sitting next to her friends who you have never met. You somehow got stuck next to her weird friends from high school that she just HAD to invite. You spend the dinner on your phone waiting for it to be over.
6. No fun if you’re not 21. Because you are the only one who is still 20, you get stuck being the DD while everyone else is ordering drinks at dinner. Not only are they having more fun at dinner, but also they have a head start on the pregame.
7. Free dessert!! (Just kidding, that will be included in the check). You tell the waiter you are here for a birthday dinner, is there any free dessert we can get? Waiter says yeah no problem I can bring out a free cake. Free cake meaning free for the birthday girl but included in all your checks.
8. You are forced to go to dinner at a place you don’t even like. I just paid $30 for a dinner I didn’t even want. Papa Johns costs under $10 and is way more satisfying. I am NEVER attending a birthday dinner again.
9. Everyone is born in February and September. Is it just me, or is everyone born in February and September? This means three times as many birthday dinners as a normal month. Can’t you guys all combine them or something?
10. You have a summer birthday and you are bitter. Your birthday is during summer and no one celebrates with you. So why should you have to attend 20 birthday dinners throughout the year when you get nothing in return?!
When your birthday rolls around and you think about inviting 25 people to dinner, stop yourself. Instead invite 25 people over for drinks (people will like you WAY more).
