1. "Maybe I'll go to the gym later."

Nah, I'll start going next week.

2. "I'll start a diet as well."

Is pizza and wine a good diet?

3. "That's it. I'm dropping out of school."

Probably not the brightest idea you have had.

4. "What do I even want to do with my life?"

Contemplating your major and life plans for the tenth time.

5. "How did I use most of my flex already?"

Time to lay off the pumpkin spice lattes.

6. "I'll work on raising my GPA next semester."

Isn't that what you said last semester?

7. "This class was suppose to be an easy A."

Well, C's earn degrees. Right?

8. "I'll just ask my professor for extra credit."

Wait... when are his office hours. Where even is his office?

9. "Wow... I'm poor."

I wonder how that happened?

10. "Is it Thanksgiving break yet?"

Couple more weeks!