The latent volcano of American emotions, prejudices, and insults that typically sleeps somewhere underneath middle-America showed activity in the form of Facebook posts this past Wednesday. Aside from always somehow achieving solemnity and hostility at the same time, I found these posts to be quite educational. Post-election Facebook taught me that voting for a racist doesn’t necessarily mean you support racism (I had previously thought that a vote was the most obvious symbol of support, but I apparently couldn’t have been more wrong). I discovered the reason for Twitter’s integral character count that limits the length of its users posts. I even learned several facets of the electoral college, like that it is the root cause of every one of America’s problems, including, but not limited to, racism, sexism, the economy, and drunk texting ex-lovers at 2 a.m.
But the most striking realization that these relentless social media essays brought about in my mind was that, if Donald J. Trump can successfully achieve the highest office in the world, the possibilities for electing other celebrated American tropes are endless! So, I decided to compile a list of 10 memes that could also be elected president, if they only believed in themselves hard enough.
1. Left Shark
His facial expressions are about as agonizing as his incoherent moves, but the American people would undoubtedly respect the way Left Shark dances to the beat of his own drum.
2. A crying Selena Gomez
As a celebrity, Selena Gomez has connected with various communities through her relatable music, her Latina roots, and her open discussion of mental illness. And as long as she makes this face, no one would ever be able to argue with her diplomatic policies.
3. The Dress
A key factor as a politician is being two-faced. Few American presidents have gotten where they are without changing their minds and backtracking on various issues throughout their careers. What candidate would be better at appealing to both parties than a dress that changes colors every time you look at it.
4. Daniel (and his Vans)
Everyone knows there is certain sense of style that accompanies a successful presidential candidate. With a strong campaign team, it would only be a matter of time before every American was shouting a celebratory, “Damn, Daniel!”
5. That face vein kid
Just look at him. His determination is unmatched. This is a man who understands the stress that comes with an American presidency.
6. A confused Mr. Krabs
After an election season like this one, confused Americans have been left searching for a candidate who can relate to their emotions on a personal level. Here you go, folks.
7. Pepe
Who has a broader skill set than Pepe? Who can personally connect with the diverse American populous better than this multifaceted amphibian? No one.
8. The Internet Troll
This one is basically a variation of Donald Trump. I mean, if it worked once, it could happen again…
9. Sweet Brown
“Trickle down economics… Ain’t nobody got time for that!”
10. Harambe
With over 11,000 votes in this past 2016 election, this lovable, deceased ape has already hit the ground running in terms of politics. At this rate, he’ll have the electoral in the bag by 2020.
