Being a gentleman is about making a conscious effort to put the woman you are dating above yourself. It is about using your actions, words, mannerisms, and gestures to prove that she is important, and that kind of effort takes work. It means that you need to act like a man, and leave the superficial beliefs of our generation on the back burner. Being a gentleman has nothing to do with weekly "WCW" social media posts, silly grandeur prom gestures, or purchasing extremely expensive gifts during the holiday season. A gentleman proves himself every day through his actions.
Here are 10 things that the gentlemen of 2016 are doing right, and other men should step up to the plate.
1. They call their partner beautiful, not hot.
She isn't a stove or the desert sun, so she isn't hot. She is a woman and she deserves to be treated like one.
2. They open the door for their date.
We may live in an era of equality, but I can guarantee you that slamming the door in your date's face is considered rude no matter what her view on feminism happens to be. Also, walk around and grab the car door for her, women always notice that, and we like it more than we will ever let on
3. They show up on time.
If you say that you're going to pick up your date at seven, get there fifteen minutes early. Your date will definitely not be ready yet, and she will probably be running thirty minutes behind, but she is glad that you are there waiting. We would rather see that you're eager to go out with us than wonder if you are even going to show up. Make her feel like there is nowhere else you would rather be than sitting in the living room making awkward small talk with her family.
4. They focus on you, and they leave other women out of it.
If you're serious about wanting one woman, then don't try to keep your options open. Don't text other girls. Don't comment on the beauty of other women. Compliment your woman. Text your woman. Be the guy who your friends make fun of for how much you openly adore your partner because those are the guys who will go the distance.
5. They treat your parents with respect.
Say yes ma'am and no sir when addressing her parents. Gentlemen ask permission for marriage, respect decisions that her parents make that they may not agree with, and ask her parents how they are doing out of genuine care.
6. They don't constantly point out your flaws.
Real gentlemen can see your imperfections, but they don't highlight them. They choose to focus on your strongest attributes. They want to help build up your self esteem and make you feel important, so they do their best not to give you any reasons to be insecure.
7. They don't share personal details about your life or family when things don't work out between the two of you.
Gentlemen keep the knowledge that they learn about someone to themselves if a relationship doesn't work out. They respect the knowledge that they have gathered over your time together, and they value your feelings and reputation. They don't cause a scene or start rumors. They protect you through their silence. Just because things didn't work out doesn't mean that they lose their manners.
8. They are honest with you.
They don't tell you that they are at grandma's 90th birthday dinner when they're actually at a party getting hammered. If they want to go somewhere that they don't think that you would be comfortable with, they man up and ask you if it is alright. Honesty will prevent a lot of fights from occurring because your partner will always find out when you have lied, and they will confront you with it later. Plot twist: you don't even have a 90 year old grandma.
9. They never use profanity to address their partner.
Although this may seem obvious, you wouldn't believe the number of men who think that it is funny to call their partner the "B" word when asking her to do something. That is not a gentleman. That is an immature boy who was not taught how to talk to a woman.
10. They put their phone away when they are on a date with you.
If he is too busy texting, talking on the phone, or checking his social media accounts to even hold a conversation with you then you should leave. It's just a waste of time to invest effort into someone that is more invested in an inanimate object. Don't take excuses for his phone invasion. There really isn't an excuse for being a rude and lousy date. A gentleman will try to get to know you on the date, not the girls of Instagram.
So on behalf of women everywhere, thank you to the gentlemen of 2016. You restore hope in young women who run into a lot of unpleasant experiences in the dating world today. Chivalry isn't dead, and although it may be unpopular, it is the key to getting the girl. We don't really care about material items or status, we just want to be able to see that you care through your actions.
Gentlemen are like pizza; the cheesier the better.
