Hello, incoming freshmen! I know that all of you are very excited to start college. A word of advice though: even if you think that you're prepared, you're not. I can promise you that much. College is a huge transition, and I'm not talking about just classes. Living independently from your parents is definitely going to leave you shell-shocked. It is a whole lot of freedom all at once, and it is wonderful, yet terrifying.
You have to do all the things that your parents used to do for you. Wash your clothes, clean your room, bathe yourself, wipe your own ass, etc. It's a lot of responsibility. That is why I am here to help you with getting into the groove of college life. Here's a nifty list of essentials that will save your life!
1. Clorox disinfectant wipes.
I'd like to start out by stating that you and/or your roommate are actually slobs. We all are. College kids are disgusting. There will be a lot of spills, odd and sticky puddles and other mysterious stains that you will need to clean up. Clorox wipes will be your saving grace.
2. Febreze.
Next, you guys will smell like rancid meat. B.O., farts, dirty clothes/sheets, decaying food and other scents will invade your room and take over every inch of it. Febreze is there to fend off the scent monster and leave your room smelling nice and fresh! Invest in Febreze. It also helps save you from having to wash clothes. When you don't have time to wash your clothes, spray them down with Febreze, and let them dry. You're welcome.
3. Netflix.
If you're not your 50-year-old dad, setting up your cable might be a tad bit difficult. Even when you are able to set it up, it's more than likely standard cable. Netflix is there to give you that added boost of more options. For $7.99 per month, you get access to your favorite shows and movies with the click of a button (Oh wow, I really just sounded like a commercial...). But honestly, you will love having Netflix; you'll just need to find the time to watch T.V. first.
4. HDMI cable.
To follow up on Netflix, would you rather watch it on your itty, bitty laptop screen or your T.V.? I think we all know the answer to that question. Buy an HDMI cable. Enough said.
5. Toothpaste.
You're probably thinking, "Why is this guy naming something that should be a no-brainer?" The answer is very simple. This is a non-conventional use that I'm sure none of you have thought of. Most schools have a policy that you cannot use tacks to hang up posters, tapestries, lights, etc. Meaning that you cannot leave holes in the walls. However, trying to hang this stuff up with tape is nearly impossible. At the end of the year, you can use toothpaste to fill in the holes and make it seem like you never even "vandalized" the school's property.
6. Tide Pods.
Do you know how to wash your own clothes? I ask this because most freshman, especially guys, have never washed clothes in their entire lives. It is not necessarily that it is hard but if you add too much soap, it's going to look like a bubble machine exploded. Tide Pods make that a hell of a lot easier for everyone. It's already pre-measured; all you have to do is grab two, throw them in the washer and press start. BAM! You just washed your first load of clothes. Don't forget to separate the whites and darks.
7. COFFEE.
Cofee will give you life! College students run off of coffee. They single-handedly keep Starbucks in business. It is the only thing that keeps them going throughout the day. First thing you do in the morning is inject coffee into your veins with a syringe. No joke, man. Buy a Keurig. You will love it.
8. Ramen/Snacks.
Make sure that you have Ramen noodles and other snacks readily at hand. There will be many, many times that you will be hungry and either a) Out of meal swipes, b) Too broke to go buy food, or c) Too lazy to move to go get food. By keeping food in your room, that will save you from having to ever leave your room. I mean aside from going to class...if you actually feel like going to class.
Good luck, guys! College is a fun and scary ride. Buckle up and hold on tight. Remember that you can do it. You are not the first person to go through all of this, and you're not going to be the last. Make friends and survive together. You got this!
