Last Thursday, Cosmopolitan UK released the news that NASA had validated a 13th astrological sign, rendering the zodiac calendar we all know and love completely inaccurate. This sign, first discovered thousands of years ago by the Babylonians, is called Ophiuchus and correlates with birthdates between Nov 29 – Dec 17, resulting in a shift of dates for the other 12 signs. Reports show that this new calendar causes a change in astrological sign for a whopping 87% of people, so the outbreak of confusion that has since erupted is hardly surprising. I myself was alarmed when I first heard about this rumor; I am hardly a superstitious person but I do enjoy reading my horoscope from time to time, so being told that I am in fact a Gemini, not a Cancer as I had always believed, was a slightly traumatic experience. I can only imagine the panicked reactions of those who really do look to the stars for the answers to all questions past, present, and future. So, is it really true? Is everything you thought you knew about your astrological identity false?

Fortunately, all signs point to no. You can relax now; you and your boyfriend's signs are still compatible, you can still expect ~great things~ to come at the end of this week, and you can cancel that appointment you made to get the tattoo of your sign removed from your ribs. The only sources that have reported this destiny changing news seem to be Cosmopolitan, Teen Vogue, and Perez Hilton... not exactly what one might expect when searching for the release of government research. In fact, it appears that NASA is slightly annoyed to be getting so much attention over a topic that many regard as nothing more than glorified fortune telling. As Nasa spokesman, Dwayne Brown, recently told Gizmodo:

"Nasa studies astronomy not astrology."

So, where did this vicious rumor come from? According to Brown these allegations stem from an article published in Space Place, NASA's website for children, last January that describes astrology, explains the math behind the zodiac calendar, and -gasp!- mentions the long forgotten 13th sign. One glance at this piece tells us all we need to know in the form of a cartoon man who's voice bubble reminds us that "Astrology is NOT science!" It turns out that NASA has more important things to do than study divination, so next time we need information about the zodiac calendar, palm reading, or tarot cards, we're going to have to turn to some other source, perhaps a different agency of the U.S. Government.