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You've got mail!

An ode to the mailman

Rebecca Charlotte

Sep 02, 2016

Westfield State University

Dear Mailman,

I don’t think you know how much power you really have. You hold all the cards. From birthday to condolence.

When e-mail was created it was the greatest thing ever, we would sit around with butterfly clips in our hair trying to navigate MySpace and AIM while listening to Blink 182 and Britney. When we heard that robotic voice saying “You’ve got mail!” it was the most amazing thing in the world. We were special! It was a time in history when e-mail hadn’t really caught on in the adult world. We were those cool kids who were “technologically savvy.” Facebook was still for young people and old people still needed to call their grandkids to figure out dial up. It was a time in history where dial up was still even a thing. So when the computer pinged saying “You’ve got mail!” it was obviously something important. Becky from art class was messaging you about what Nick with the dreamy blue eyes said about you. Or what she swore was probably about you…who cares! You could dress up his words with meaning while simultaneously undressing him in your mind’s eye. Or maybe it was your BFF IMing you to ask if you wanted to go to Blockbuster. These were the days where the phrase “Be kind, rewind” was a very serious platitude. So with all this e-mailing and instant messaging who cared about letters in the mail? If you got a letter it wasn’t life changing. It was either some clothes catalogue or American Girl magazine that you never managed to be able to unsubscribe from. Snail mail? Who cares! I’m fourteen! Life is about snap bracelets and trying to dye your hair with kool-aid!

FLASH FORWARD TO SENIOR YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL 2012 POOF! BANG! HUZZAH! TIME TRAVEL GUYS!

Me to mailman: is there anything for me?

Mailman to me: No, not yet. *hands dog treat to dog*

Me to him: Why does the dog get mail and not me! Are you sure? Maybe it got lost in the truck or something? I applied to seven schools! Seven! I need to know now! I mean, I know I only sent out my applications a few days ago but THE AGONY IS KILLING ME AND YOU HOLD ALL THE POWER! So can you just re-check?

Mailman to me (as he’s already in the mail truck and has the engine running): Sorry kid, not today.

FLASH FORWARD TO SOPHOMORE YEAR OF COLLEGE!

Roommate to me: I’m going to the mail room to see if we got any mail!

Me to roommate a few minutes later: Did I get any mail? Did I? Did I? HERE’S THE MAIL IT NEVER FAILS IT MAKES ME WANT TO WAG MY TAIL MAILLLLL!!!

Roommate to me: here’s your mail now shut up.

Me to roommate: okay byeeee~~ (sung to the tune of Frozen)

FLASH FORWARD TO ONE MONTH AFTER I GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE!

WHY DO I ONLY GET BAD NEWS IN MY E-MAIL? Spam spam spam spam spam. Bank reminders. Student loans. Can I just like un-subscribe from all of this whole being an adult? Why why why? I WANT SOME GOOD NEWS! I will stake out the mail box every day until I found out if I got into graduate school!

These are all of the reasons why the mail man holds all of the power.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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You've got mail!

An ode to the mailman

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

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