Why is everyone obsessed with being happy?

Don’t get me wrong I want to be happy. I want my friends and family to be happy. I would love it if everyone on earth were happy all the time! That’s not a real possibility though. I know that I just am not capable of being happy every day and hour of the year. I also know that you, the person who only Instagrams pictures with puppies and sunflowers, can’t be happy all the time either.

Why is that a big deal?

Why can’t we all be okay and accepting that, sometimes, you’re not going to be a “ray of sunshine”. Who cares if you’re sad and feel like sulking? The wide range of human emotions is supposed to be this remarkable, unique trait that we’re supposed to celebrate, not turn our backs on.

It seems to me that many of us are under the impression that we’re supposed to be happy all the time, and that being anything but smiley is frowned upon. It’s almost as if appearing unhappy has become some sort of “social suicide." Sounds stupid doesn’t it?

To prove my point, look at your Instagram feed. I guarantee it is full of people smiling with quotes about happiness and loving life, pictures of people surrounded by their 50 “closest” friends, or other images making it appear that they are loving every second of their lives.

Now think about twitter, remember the last time someone posted a negative/sad tweet or depressing song lyric? Do you remember what people said? From my experience, anytime someone has tweeted something even implying that they weren’t happy, it’s been met with harsh judgment from others (“She’s just a miserable person”, “She’s weird”, etc.).

The above has become a new norm for our generation, but it’s totally wrong.

Shaming others for feeling sad, upset, angry – or any other emotion – is messed up. You have bad days sometimes right? It’s normal and doesn’t reflect on any individual’s character. Even worse, what if this person is struggling with an illness such as depression? Maybe they really can’t be happy during this time in their life. Instead of turning away because their post is “awkward”, wouldn’t it be better for you to reach out to them?

The pressure to be happy resulting from the awkwardness and shame associated with emotions outside of happiness can be detrimental to a person, or even society as a whole. When only you see and hear from others about how great everything is, you start to think something is wrong with you when your life doesn’t look or feel like everyone else’s. I’ve felt this way before, don’t act like you haven’t either.

What I’m really trying to get at is that our culture shouldn’t be solely centered on being happy. You are supposed to experience sadness, that’s not something you should (ironically) feel bad about. It’s also something you shouldn’t judge others for. Close friendships are made by revealing the "hidden“ parts of yourself, aka the parts of you and your life not filled with sunshine and rainbows. How can you ever live a genuine life, and maybe actually be truly happy, if you can’t open yourself up like that to others? How will we ever find world peace? (Ok, that’s dramatic but you get my point)

Now can we all just be friends and feel all the feels?