"You're Not Acting Like Yourself"
Start writing a post
Student Life

"You're Not Acting Like Yourself"

I can barely figure myself out so stop telling me who I am

1091
"You're Not Acting Like Yourself"
Ivan Golovchak

We have a very multi-faceted personality as individuals. This is a great thing as we all know because of individuality, different ideas, enlightening other people, etc,. However, no one acknowledges the hard part of being a said individual and no one acknowledges the hypocrisy that people carry out toward those people.

What I'm saying here is that when people tote around the "be yourself" card and essentially give it out to everyone that they see yet when that person is showing a different portion of what makes up their said "self" all the sudden people look the other way or simply state, "you're not acting like yourself". This statement I have a real issue with, I can not express how livid I am when this comes up. I'll explain...

People do not know who they are yet. We do not know all of our facets, all of our likes, dislikes, because we are always changing and meeting new people that open our eyes to new things. We are always exploring who we are in that moment. Sometimes though, we don't know why we act certain ways around others or in a different environment or process something differently than before.

Sometimes we project an image of ourselves--regardless if it's intentional or not--to different groups of people and so those groups of people only experience you in that certain way. When these people experience you in one way they subconsciously assume that this is you. This is all you are. Anything deviating from this type of mood, humor, attitude etc., is "out of character" for you and "weird".

This is what frustrates me because no one, no single individual, is one sided. We all have expansive sides to us that come out depending on our environment and what is going on in our lives. In fact, I argue that we don't have a true self. Those million and one ways we act help make up the individual that we are and it's a matter of what side of ourselves that we are most comfortable with.

"Who we are" is all about when we feel the most safe and comfortable with ourselves, who is around us when we feel this way? Where are we when we feel this way? This is why we have that cliche "I'm only me when I'm with you" it's because we feel most comfortable being who we are at that time around that person or in that environment.

The second issue that goes along with this is communication. When people see that you are sad or just not in the mood you will get the inevitable, "What's wrong? You're not yourself" here's the issue with this...

...no one actively listens to your answer. I already know EXACTLY what the response is every single time I tell someone what's wrong: "Oh." "That sucks." "I'm sorry." "It'll get better." or my most hated one, "I don't know what to tell you". My response to them is, "Then why did you ask?"

The cherry on top is that no one can seem to accept that how you are acting in that moment is a part of who you are. They think you're in a mood, you'll get out of it, you'll get "back to normal" soon. How they perceive you to be normal may not be how you feel most comfortable with yourself though.

People need to begin to acknowledge that how we handle emotions and anything in general is apart of who we are. You cannot designate a person to one facet, that is completely unfair and not right. When we speak to each other, we need to actively listen to them. Don't think about what you'll say in response, don't think about your schedule, actually listen to what it is they are trying to tell you. Most of the time people aren't looking for solutions from you, they just want reassurance that you are there and that you care.

So, to the people out there wondering "who they really are" just breathe. That is a life long journey. You won't figure it out anytime soon, but what you can figure out is who you are when you feel the most comfortable with yourself. To everybody in between, remember that we don't have a set facet. We are made up of a lot of things and as friends, family, and couples, we need to be ready to accept all of those sides of that person. Isn't that what real love and acceptance is anyhow?

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

16797
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

945948
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

122713
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lots of people sat on the cinema wearing 3D glasses
Pinterest

Ever wonder what your friend meant when they started babbling about you taking their stapler? Or how whenever you ask your friend for a favor they respond with "As You Wish?" Are you looking for new and creative ways to insult your friends?

Well, look no further. Here is a list of 70 of the most quotable movies of all time. Here you will find answers to your questions along with a multitude of other things such as; new insults for your friends, interesting characters, fantastic story lines, and of course quotes to log into your mind for future use.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments