When someone asks me where my home is am I suppose to know? This has been the question I have always wondered. Home is typically seen as a physical place, a location you can insert on a GPS system, or your place of origin perhaps. Most of the people I know, know where home is for them. Usually this means home is where their family is or where they grew up. They seem so sure of themselves when they answer. I never do. Maybe they haven't been caught between two places or maybe they have a number of places they call home.
On a trip to New York I met a stellar woman working at a gallery in Dumbo and going to school for a BFA in art. We had a conversation about her life as a student, working the gallery, and how she liked the city. There was something about her I felt like I could relate to. When we talked about home again I scrambled for an answer. I told her the place I was born (it is my go to). She smiled and went on to tell me where she was from. A different conversation then ensued.
She told me sometimes it was hard to know where home was. For the last couple years she had been living in the Brooklyn area and taking a plane to visit her family in Bangladesh when she could. The two places did not exist as exclusive ideas anymore. One place was as much home as the other. This got me thinking, how do we know? Is home something plural or is it more than a physical place?
"...There’s nothing I won’t steal or borrow
I’ll travel on a boat or airplane
I’ll explore a world of sorrow
'Cause when I find you I know, I know I’ma be OK
See the times are changing
And I’m sure of nothing that I know
Except this is us, and this is love, and this is where I’m home..." -Where I Sleep by Emeli Sandé
Sometimes people say they are home when they are with someone. Often times that someone is a loved one.
Maybe the more grueling question is how do we know what home is? Some people spend years building a place for themselves both physically and emotionally. Others never find a place to call home. Is it because home is a difficult concept to grasp for those who have not experienced a stable home or a home at all.
When you spend your life trying to figure out where home is for you, you probably don't have the answer when the question pops up. I personally hate using the word home because I have no associations with it. Home is not a physical place. Home is not a person. I have no clue where home is to me. I have not found it. But who wants to go through all that with everyone you meet? Saying home is (insert here) is easier.
When the term "home for the holidays," comes around where do you go if you do not have a home? What about the phrase home is where the he is? Home now is about creation and discovery. Some people have to work to build a place of their own somewhere in the world. You can argue everyone does. When home can mean a number of things it is up to each of us to define what those things are.
For me home is something in need of discovery. It may be a person a place, or both. Home may even exist between multiple locations. I do not know presently what it is but the conversation intrigues me.
