Some say that people either have the brains or the perfect body.

An arrogant mind and a shallow heart is what you are as you search for both to grope perfection.

You rated me, always reminding me I was a six out of 10, and convinced me that stupidity was all that I had because I couldn’t understand or pass the science classes you were majoring in.

To you I was nothing as I have no appearances to define my worth or the academic grades to show myself off.

You claimed that I had no goals, no dreams to conquer so naturally, I am the person you believe who let days go to waste for that is a permission to you to treat me wrongly.

What you just failed to comprehend is the beauty in how I am and how my brain functions as I am not pursuing science to invent, to observe, to study like you, but in writing to inspire, to send a message, to speak. That is my goal.

So, let me enlighten you with a part of me, that you did not accept to be worthy or intelligent, an idea of what I can be and what I am as you read this poem through my goals as you choke on the word “regret”.

A Messed Up Game to Compensate Loneliness

You told me you were “just a guy”, “one human being”.

So why did I tear to pieces from just “A person”?

Well A person can hurt another.

A person can kill another as murder is what you’ve done to me.

No, I am not the only victim who almost died in your sociopathic hands as Miss A, the one who only had the brains but no looks to you, was the first experiment to begin with.

Your sentence to her was simple as you batted her head with your ongoing, compulsive lies causing her deafness and blindness.

“Golddigger” was she known for, as you branded her with that low life name to the world from your grudges.

But only praises you gave in front of her as cowardness was your signature move.

She was innocent and happy as she was deaf from the whispers and was blinded by the glares,

Yet she still walks clueless with you as deafness and blindness never left. One more bat in the head then that would’ve been a justifiable homicide case towards you.

Now I am your next victim for I have no brain, no looks to you, so I became your first kill to your disgusting game you play.

More traps, more pain, more sensation you got from corrupting me.

You duct tape my mouth with silence because you fear the truth I now yell freely.

You had your time displaying your promotion for your heroic image while I was stuck in the back bleeding from the tape you wrapped so tightly to seal my lips.

You sealed my lips as you forbid me to tell anyone about us having a title to the relationship for you did not want to be seen as the bad guy as you knew you just wanted to use me, to keep me alive until you were bored.

You tied my hands as you didn’t want me to fight back when an argument would arise for my only response was to bow my head and apologize. Yet you kept blaming me till I believed it was my fault in the end. It was my fault as I always saw your point of view but you never saw mine.

Bruises were left as it was given only to my neck for I am your property and I can’t be too close to another guy for I must take care of your jealousy.

At times your voice recorder would be on repeat as the main note emphasizes my weight for I must cut deep till I can cut my fat. It wasn’t your butcher work so no evidence traced back to you.

Then when I would resist from feeding your urges, your disappointment and persistent questions would break every inch of my bone till I was unmovable. You only yearned for me until you were finished, then you naturally kicked me away, for now all my bones are not just broken but shattered.

I have been abused by your words as you carved my flaws in my mind, for I am my mistakes that you list of me.

In the end, you were so ashamed in your incomplete production of me that you added another girl in the game, Lady B, for she was different as she had the creation you wanted with the brain and the perfect look.

So you put her up on the pedestal and fucked her.

The world was yours as you flaunted your victory to everyone you knew for you won because of her, you won for adding your numbers.

Even though she had the brains, it was her appearances that was mainly the key to publicize your “admirable” image. Therefore to you, you found your perfection, your goddess, so you worshipped her. No batting in the head, no tapes or ties to restrict, no bones to break, no cuts. Just two hands clasp together idolizing her.

Now you slowly see no use in me for you don’t have the boredom anymore as the ideal work you wanted is in your hands. It was game over for me, so you did what was easily done without any hesitation.

The next day the news shows victim two dead from manslaughter.

So congratulation for deafening and blinding a girl, a friend who still walks beside you not knowing what you’ve done to her. Congratulation for killing a soul, a friend who still cares about you, by being too ashamed of her. Congratulation for the ways you’ve done to others to find your perfect goddess.

You must be proud.

But to be honest, I forgive you for everything as you aren’t perfect and merely a human being.

So please understand that you can’t be mad at me speaking aloud for you weren’t the one murdered.

I only speak to help you see your vices you think is acceptable and not harmful for now you finally see things in my point of view. I am not changing your prize-worthy image to a filthy one as it was a mistake you made and I won’t label you or hold it against you for that would be low of me.

I speak to reach out to those in the same situation to be strong and be saved.

So go ahead and do you as it makes you happy to add numbers in bed than in relationships but don’t plan to trick others, scheme them in your bed, to kill them for who they are for they came in your game to be a friend, an ally, not to be a performer or a pawn.

Just because someone does not hold your standards or your expectations, that does not allow you to take them for granted and devalue them for their weakness.

Those girls who don’t have the appearances you label as beautiful or who don’t have the brain you consider intelligent have it hard enough on themselves for you who would judge them, categorize them, manipulate them, objectify them, cheapen them are pushing them till they can take no more. Now do you see what you’ve done? Do you still want to play your inhumane game?

Again, I forgive you because I don’t hold grudges, but I hope you’ll change as I will be the one protecting those you prey upon for your deadly game you’re willing to keep playing.

So murder any other girl by the way she thinks or by the way she eats and I will give you a lesson and show you how to play your game for they will be untouchable.

Do me wrong again or throw dirt on who I am for you aren’t justifying yourself but seeking vengeance and I will give you another letter and show no mercy.

So surrender for life is not a game and it is not meant to be perfect.

It’s about forgiving, understanding and accepting.